Way Back Home
by tjmack
Summary: AU/AH When her parents divorce, breaks apart her and her best friend, Edward Cullen. Bella decides that it's best to break all ties with the past. It's been five years, and a horrible accident leaves her with a choice, stay in sunny Phoenix, with her al
1. Chapter 1

Way Back Home

Summary: (AU/AH) When her parents divorce, breaks apart her and her best friend, Edward Cullen. Bella decides that it's best to break all ties with the past. It's been five years, and a horrible accident leaves her with a choice, stay in sunny Phoenix, with her alcoholic step-father, or move back to deary Forks, to live with her father Charlie. In an instant, Bella is thrown back into a world that she thought she had left behind, and finds out that just because you leave the past behind, doesn't mean that it's behind you.

* * *

Chapter One

Edward's POV

Lonely. That's one word to describe me. I always wondered how a person could feel so lonely, and alone, when constantly surrounded by people. Three-hundred and fifty-seven students attend Forks High School, my high school. Yet I feel alone. Makes no sense right? Yeah that's what I thought. I realize though, that my loneliness started the day that I lost my best friend. Although when I say lost, I mean she left. Not that she had a choice. When your twelve, and your parents divorce. You don't exactly get a say in where you live. It would have been nice to have at least kept our friendship alive through emails and letters, but I guess it was just too much for her. She stopped writing back about five years ago, or rather, three months after she made the move to Phoenix.

Most of everyone say that I'm bitter. That I just need to get over the fact that she left, and that she's not coming back. It's been five years, and I'm still holding onto some shred of hope that she'll come back. I've heard the rumors swarming around town, or well around any part of town that Chief Swan isn't located at. Apparently there was some sort of accident, and Bella's mom was killed. Now apparently, the judge has left it up to her on whether she wants to stay in Phoenix with her step-dad, or move back to Forks to live with her father. I'm sure you can guess which one I'm holding out for.

This does go without saying of course, that me and Bella didn't always get along. That we weren't always best friends. The inseparable kind. The ones that are supposed to last a lifetime, not just five short years.

I can almost remember the day that I really got to know her. Got to know Bella Swan. I know what your thinking. Two seven year-olds, don't 'really get to know each other.' That's were your wrong. Me and Bella always had this special connection. Almost like two magnets that are pulled together by sheer force. That day though, it was almost held a magical feel to it.

* * *

_**Beginning of Flashback**_

"_Come on dad!" I griped at him, scrunching up my nose. "You can't be serious! Bella Swan!?" _

"_Yes, Bella Swan. The poor girl has lived next door to us since we moved here, a year ago. I've never once seen you say more than two words to her," his words were true. I hadn't had a reason to say anything to her. She was a girl, and at seven, girls were not who little boys wanted to be caught hanging out with. Although, I did hang out with my twin sister Alice, but that was for different reasons. _

"_Is Alice at least coming?" my voice was a high-pitched whine now. _

"_No, she's going shopping with your mother. So is Emmett, not by choice of course. What about your other friend?" he asked, he never could remember Jasper's name. Like it was difficult or something. _

"_No, Jazz can't come," I pouted. _

_Stuck all day fishing with a girl, what great fun that'll be. _

"_You'll be fine Edward, maybe you'll make a new friend," he said, a genuine smile on his face. If only he knew just how true that was, and just how painful it would turn out to be. _

"_Hello Chief Swan. Can Bella come fishing with my father and me?" I asked through clenched teeth. How dare he make me ask. _

"_Well, hold on just a minute. Let me ask her if she wants to go," Charlie smiled softly at me, before disappearing behind the door. _

_Maybe she won't, I had thought to myself. I so badly wanted anything to happen, but to hang out with Bella Swan. _

"_She'd love to—--it's Edward right?" he asked me. _

"_Yes," was all I said, afraid I might say something to get me grounded if I said more. _

"_Okay great, she'll be out in just a minute," he smiled once more at me, before closing the door. _

_Sighing loudly, I walked back toward my father's car. I felt like I wanted to scream. What would Jazz say? Worse, what would Emmett say? I didn't get long to think on it, as the door on my left opened up, and in slipped Isabella Swan. She was kind of small for her age, but her big chocolate brown eyes made up for it. She had one a white long-sleeved shirt, and a pair of jeans, and a fisherman's hat, that was far to big for her head. _

"_Hi Edward," she said shyly. _

"_Hi Bella," I said, trying to keep my voice light and friendly. It was a great struggle. _

_**End of Flashback**_

* * *

Bella's POV

It had only been two weeks. Two long and agonizing weeks since my mother's accident. She ran a red light, why you might ask. Because she was late to pick me up from school. I would have much rather of sat on the corner from my school for hours waiting for her, than to be stuck with my current situation.

I had to tell Phil that I was moving back to Forks, to live with my father. Don't get me wrong, I like Phil alright. He was good to me and my mom. He's a kind man with a kind smile. With that said, he hasn't dealt with my mother's death at all. In fact he's currently going for Phoenix's number drunk. I'm only seventeen years-old. I need someone who can look after me, not someone that I need to look after. That's why I choose to move back to Forks. I am, however, dreading the move. Not only because the sun rarely shines there, no that's not the main reason. Because it's been five years since I've seen Edward Cullen, and I have a feeling that I might have hurt him.

Edward was one of my very best friends. Him, his twin sister, Alice, and I were completely inseparable when we were younger. Until my mom decided to divorce my father, and like any dispute, I got no choice in the matter. I had to make the long, lonely journey to Phoenix with my mom, and had to leave Edward and Alice behind.

I was able to move on though. Not fully, but about as close as possible. I had a new best friend, although she's more kind of substitute, which I know isn't fair to her, but I couldn't have no friends. I have a boyfriend, or better yet, had a boyfriend. I'd miss Jacob dearly. He's such a kind and sweet guy. He almost reminds me of Edward, in that way.

I do wonder sometimes, what would have become of Edward and I. If I hadn't been forced out of his life. If I could have had a choice back then. I can, almost certainly, say that I would have stayed in Forks. I would have stayed close to Edward, and that gets me wondering sometimes what would have became of our friendship. Would it have blossomed into something more, or would we just have been the very best of friends? I guess that's a question I won't ever get an answer too, considering.

Sighing, I sit down on my bed, pulling out the old tattered photo album that I haven't picked up in at least a year. Looking through it breaks my heart into pieces every time. What the hell though, I'm going back to Forks, I'll be able to see him again. Although, if he doesn't want a thing to do with me, I'll completely understand.

I automatically flip to the last page of the album. The very last picture that we took together. Right before I left Forks. Every time I look at this picture, all I see are two very heartbroken kids. Two kids without a choice about where they're life will take them. I feel the first two tears slip from my eyes, as I close them tightly, that last memory overwhelming me.

* * *

_**Beginning of Flashback**_

"_How can you make me!" I screamed at my mom, who despite **her** choice to leave my father, had tears in her eyes. _

"_Because, it just makes sense that you live with me Bella," she said, her voice held that stern motherly tone. She rarely used it, so I knew I had better listen when she did. _

_Scowling at her furiously, I walk through the front door, and slam it behind me. She knew better to follow me, or to yell at me for slamming the door later on. She knew what I was doing. I had to go tell my best friends that I was leaving. She didn't understand just how difficult that would be for me. How badly that would hurt me, to say forever goodbye. _

_I knock on the Cullen's front door, and wait patiently for someone to open it for me. Usually I would just walk right on in. None of them cared much that I did it. In fact, that's how Edward and Alice knew I was coming with either bad news, or if I was mad or upset. _

_The door flung open, interrupting my thoughts. Edward in all his glory stood in front of me. His eyes held a certain degree of worry as he waited for me to either start griping about a fight I got into with my parents. To hear how I was either grounded, or just in a lot of trouble. Lately though, I had been seeking comfort from my parents constant fighting. I knew that the divorce was inevitable. Two people who fought as much as those two did, it was just bound to happen. I guess, I just assume that they would let me choose who I wanted to live with, or at least have joint custody. At least then I'd get to come back, to visit. _

_Without so much as I word, the tears started to fall from my eyes, as I wrapped my arms around Edward's neck, my head falling against his chest. Pulling me inside, to shield me from the constant pouring rain, he held me close to him. Whispering calming things into my ear, I barely was aware that my sobbing had brought in an audience. Great, just what I wanted. To break the news, and Edward's heart in front of his whole family. _

"_Bells, what's wrong?" he finally asked, as my crying slowed down. _

_Sniffing back a new round of tears, knowing that sooner was better than later. _

"_My—parents are getting a divorce," I forced the first words out, like they left a bitter taste on my tongue. _

_He sighed, he knew it was coming too. He might not have voiced that particular opinion, but we both knew it was coming. _

"_I wish that was the worse though," I paused, leaning back from his embrace too peer into his deep green eyes. Bad idea. "I can live with them divorcing. It's really for the best. My house has been a miserable place to live for a while now. So the divorce I can live with---I have to move Edward. My mom just told me that I have to leave with her. That I'm not coming back." _

_There, my part was over. Yeah, right, as a few new tears slid down my cheeks. Edward's face was full of shock. Like he didn't quite understand the words that I had just said. I felt like maybe I should repeat myself. That maybe I should say the words slower or something. My attention was pulled from Edward's shocked face, to that of a teary-eyed one. Alice. _

"_You can't leave!" she said through her tears, as she ripped me from Edward's embrace, and pulled me into her own arms. _

"_I wish I had a choice, but my mom used her 'parent' tone," I explained. _

_Alice knew as well as I did what that meant. I looked back toward him, and saw that his face no longer held that of shock. Instead, tears were welling up into his beautiful emerald eyes, and I felt my heart break all over again. His fists were balled up at his sides. _

"_No!" _

_Alice and I both jumped at the suddenness of his voice, and the anger behind his one word._

"_Edward---"_

"_No, you can't leave Bella..." he started, but Esme put a firm hand on his shoulder, and he bit his lip. _

"_We're gonna miss you honey," she said, over Edward's shoulder. _

_Though I couldn't see her face, I knew that she was probably teary-eyed as well. I went to give Edward a comforting hug, but he just stood there, stiff as a board. Almost like my touch would burn his skin or something. It hurt, but I didn't cry. I knew this was just his way of dealing. _

"_Promise me something," he said, his voice breaking._

_I knew he was barely holding it together now. _

"_Anything."_

_I knew I shouldn't have said that word. That I couldn't promise just **anything**, but I did. _

"_Promise that you'll keep contact with me Bells. That we'll still be friends, even if it's a long distance friendship," his voice broke even worse, sounding almost hoarse with all the emotion it held. _

_I simply shook my head. Of course I would, how could I not? Sighing, and pushing back the tears that welled up in my eyes. _

"_I better get home." _

_With that, I left the Cullen's house, for the very last time. _

_**End of Flashback**_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Bella's POV

I slumped back against the seat. We were starting our decent, we were just over Seattle. In a matter of minutes, in fact, probably not more than twenty. I'd see my father again. I had missed him. Infrequent phone calls, and random sporadic letters. Not to mention the 'better-late-than-never' birthday and Christmas presents that I received every year, were just not enough. I don't think I let him know just how much I did care about him, and how much I had truly missed him. Though, I don't think he'd ever come out and say it. I truly think that the news of my mom's death hurt him deeply. How could it not? They're divorced, that didn't mean that they didn't still care about one another's well-being. I mean, for god's sakes, they were married for nearly twelve years, give or take. You don't just stop caring about someone that you had loved for that amount of time just because you didn't quite get along anymore.

I shifted, as I reached for my seatbelt, as the red light flashed the warning. Snapping it into place, I let my hands grip the rests tightly. I had never really been a fan of flying. More or less, I hated it, unless it was absolutely necessary. There was no way I was gonna have Charlie drive all the way to Phoenix to get me. That would have just made me leaving that much worse on Phil, who actually started to cry when I was getting into my taxi. In the four years that I had known Phil, I had never once seen him shed a tear. Even when he broke his leg in three places during one of his baseball games, he didn't cry. He said some pretty colorful things, but he didn't cry. I hugged him, and apologized for leaving. He told me he understood why, and that he wasn't upset with my decision.

The jerk from the planes wheels making contact with the runway below, pulled me, harshly from my thoughts. Finally, I was home. While I did love living in Phoenix. It was warm and sunny, hardly ever rained. That was nice. I did miss Forks dearly. Even if it did rain nearly everyday. Even if it was hardly ever sunny. Even if the Pacific air always had an icy touch to it, even in the dead of summer, I still missed it.

Finally the captain told us that we had arrived to our distenation. Then the seatbelt light flicked off, and I unbuckled myself, standing up from my seat. My legs were stiff, I hadn't moved much during the flight. Bad idea. I tried my hardest to reach above my head to get my carry-on down.

"Let me help," a young man, his blond hair spiked up in perfection said. A kind smile on his face, his eyes were a faded blue.

"Thanks," I said, my eyes wavering from his, as I blushed. Such an embarrassing tell.

"Not a problem," he said, his voice was just as kind and gentle as his eyes were.

I grabbed the bag from his hands, and slid it over my shoulder, hurrying toward the exit. Walking down the long, tunnel like hallway, I quickly wondered if Charlie would be waiting at arrivals, or if he would be waiting at the baggage claim. Shrugging my shoulders, I came to the end of the tunnel like hallway, and saw that he was there waiting for me.

"Bells," his voice was cheery. That was so---unlike my dad.

"Hey dad," I said back, as I fought off a yawn. Obviously not my best idea to catch the red eye, and the lack of sleep was catching up to me.

"Let's get you home, and in bed. You look dead tired Bella, have you been sleeping?" he asked, as he grabbed for my carry-on, and I surrendered it without so much as a fight.

"Sort of?" I answered, my tone was more of a question though.

"Bells?" his voice raised as did one eyebrow.

"Not really, not a lot," I stressed the words.

"Why not?" he asked.

Did he really have to? Was it possible to forget that my mom had just died two and a half weeks earlier?

"Really dad?" I asked back, as realization hit his features.

"Oh, I'm sorry Bella. I'm being insensitive," he answered quickly.

"It's okay dad. Although the lack of sleep is catching up to me. Please tell me that I won't start school till at least tomorrow," my eyes were hopeful. He wasn't a cruel man.

"Of course not Bella. You won't start school till Wednesday, I made sure," he said confidently.

"Thanks dad," I managed a crooked smile, as we arrived at baggage claim, and he grabbed up my two suitcases quickly.

"Not a problem Bells, but promise me that you won't fall down from exhaustion. I don't think I could manage to carry you, on top of everything else," he chuckled lightly at his joke. That's my dad, make joke the first chance he got.

"I'll try not too," and just like as if on cue, a loud yawn escaped my exhausted lips. "No promises though," I added quickly.

* * *

Edward's POV

I paced the full length of my living room, only to turn around and do it again. She was back. I saw her. My own eyes. Fully dressed, and ready for school, and now thinking of ditching just to get the chance to talk to her. Sighing, I know I shouldn't. She's probably sleeping. She looked like she hadn't slept in ages. Purple shadows under her eyes, which were sagging near closed as she stumbled up onto the porch.

"What are you pacing about?" Alice asked finally. She hated it when I paced like this. It made her anxious.

"Bella's back."

"Seriously?" she asked, her voice raised a few octaves.

"Yeah, I just saw Charlie pull up. She looks as if she hadn't slept in a few weeks. Not that I can blame her. Would you be able to sleep much in her position?" I asked her.

While none of my siblings harbored any sort of 'friendly' feelings for Bella anymore. Just because of what her lack of contact had done to me over the years. I knew that deep down, Alice was really happy and excited to have her back. I knew that despite everything, that those two would be best friends again, rather quickly. I hoped that I would be able to be friends with her again soon too. I wanted to so badly, but my wounded heart ached at the thought.

"Is this good or bad though?" she asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

"Not sure I understand what you mean," I said back to her, as my pacing came to a stop so I could face her.

"Do you think she's really back for good? I mean, she'll be eighteen next year. What makes you think she won't high-tail it out of her just as soon as she's legal?" Alice asked, suddenly not quite as excited as she had been.

"I think she'll stay, at least for a while. If she thinks she can patch up things, she'd probably be more likely to stay---" I paused momentarily before placing a hand on each of my sister's shoulders. "Alice, promise that you'll take it easy on her. I'm sure she'll get enough grief from everyone else. She doesn't need it from you too."

She nodded, but glared at me momentarily, "You deserve to give her grief. She's earned at least that Edward. What, with what she's put you through these past five years. The way she's hurt you. I mean, she's Bella, and I'll always love her like a sister, but she hurt you, she deserves to know how badly."

She had a point, but I wasn't sure I could hurt Bella like that. The way she had hurt me. My shoulders slumped as I realized that I might not be able to choose though. I had been known, especially more recently, for my temper. For getting angry, and upset easily. I might blurt things out in anger. Though they might be true, that doesn't mean that it wont' hurt her all the same.

"I promise to be good—as good as I can be, if you promise to tell her, calmly if you'd like, just how badly she hurt you. She deserves to know," Alice added in quickly.

I nodded my head, she was right. Bella had put me in pain, and I had the right tell explain just how bad that pain was for me. I just hope I didn't hurt her too badly when I did.

* * *

Bella's POV

I felt my body freeze, and then shudder, and then suddenly I was sitting upright in my bed, screaming as if someone was strangling the life from my body. I could feel the sensation of someone's hands wrapped around my shoulders, and it felt like they might be shaking me, but still I screamed.

The dream had been so real. Like I had actually been there. Like I was there, watching her die. Watching the life drain slowly from her body. I watched the accident, unable to stop it, but knowing it was coming. Then I had to watch as she mumbled incoherently, saying my name over and over, and unable to save her, to protect her.

I felt the tears streaming down my cheeks, but I wasn't able to pull myself from my own mind. I didn't know who was in my room. For all I knew, it could be someone strangling me, although I doubted that. I suddenly realized that whoever it was, Charlie knew that they were here, otherwise he would be in my room, gun drawn ready to shoot.

I blinked away the last remaining tears, as I felt the heavy fog lift from my mind, and slowly realization started to hit me. I saw my walls, my door. Slowly turning my head, I saw two pair of worry-stricken emerald eyes. I knew it was wrong, I knew I hadn't earned it, but I leaned forward, resting my head against his chest. It felt right, it felt like home. My body stopped shaking, the tears stopped falling, as a calm overcame me.

"Bella, talk to me," his voice had changed quite a bit since the last time I saw him. Given that had been five years ago, and he had definitely hit puberty.

"Just a dream," I mumbled softly, trying to keep the images from my mind.

"Sounded more like a nightmare to me," he said, his voice was deep, and a little husky, but still held an angelic tone to it.

"Yeah—that's why I don't sleep," I confessed. I hadn't told anyone about the constant, terrifying nightmares that had plagued me since my mom's death. Phil was generally too drunk to realize that I was screaming my head off in the middle of the night.

"Bella, please," he begged, and I couldn't' say no. Not after everything I had put him through, it was only fair.

"Okay—It's just...I've been having nightmares since my mom died," I paused, I couldn't describe them. I didn't want to. I didn't want to burden another person with the horrific and graphic details of my very real nightmare.

"I'm so sorry," he said, as he softly kissed the top of my head.

This was wrong, he should be yelling at me. He should be screaming. He should hate me. He shouldn't be comforting me.

"Don't be—I don't deserve it, and I definitely haven't earned it," I pointed out as I rose from the comfort of his chest.

"What are you talking about Bella? Your mom died, of course you deserve to have sympathy. I know I'd be in like a million pieces if anything happened to Esme," he pointed out. He sounded angry, good, I deserved angry.

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean that I deserve sympathy from _you_," I said softly, as realization lit up in his green eyes.

"You know?" he asked carefully, as he stood up from my bed.

It wasn't until now that I realized just how much Edward had grown since I had seen him. Just how much he had changed, without actually changing. He was much taller, at least six foot, probably taller. His face had changed from the slightly rounded chubbiness that it had been when he was younger, to a much more masculine, crisp tightness. His jawline very defined. His shirt clung to his arms, and his chest, he appeared to be quite muscular. He was hot, in every definition of the word, but more than that. While his face was very masculine, it also held a certain—beauty to it.

"Know what? That I hurt you? I'm not stupid Edward," I answered as I too stood up from my bed. I didn't know what time it was, although if Edward was here, then it was probably afternoon sometime.

"I didn't think you realized--" his sentence trailed off.

"Of course I did Edward. You know what, I expected none of this. In fact, I expected you to hate me. To not speak to me. I expected that I'd have to beg and grovel, just to get you to yell at me. I deserve all of that. With that said, can I please explain myself to you?" I asked him, not that I deserved even that, not so quickly.

He didn't voice his answer, instead he shook his head, as he walked across my room, and sat in the rocking chair in the corner. I followed after him, he had to see the pain in my eyes for this to work correctly.

"I didn't realize how badly my decision would hurt you Edward. I just knew that I couldn't take it anymore. You might not have realized it, but even though you kept your emails and letters upbeat—I could feel the pain behind your words. I could feel the pain in every single word that you wrote, and it broke my heart. It hurt so badly to know that you were hurting. Not that I had a choice, not that I could do anything to fix it. I think that's what hurt me the most. Was knowing that you were in pain and I couldn't fix it. That I couldn't comfort you. You were always so good at fixing my pain. Of making me feel better, and the one time you needed me, I couldn't be there. You have to understand that me and my mom did not have the best relationship for that first year--" I paused gaging his reaction. It was one of shook, like he hadn't expected this.

"In fact to be honest, I spent more time in my room, blaring loud music that I couldn't stand just to make her mad. I was constantly grounded, because I was constantly running my mouth about what a horrible decision that it had been. Dragging me away from the only home I knew. Taking me away from my friends. Slowly I got over it. Stopped blaming her. It wasn't doing me any good anyways. Those first three months Edward though. I cried myself to sleep every night. Wishing that my mom would suddenly realize that she had made a mistake and let me move back to Forks. After that third month, and I was still stuck in Phoenix, I gave up hope. I knew I was stuck, and that I would be at least until I turned eighteen. I knew it would be painful, and I knew I promised you, but I couldn't' take the letters anymore. So I figured that if I broke off contact with you, that you'd be able to move on. To forget me. I wanted that so badly for you. It was only fair. I wish I could say that I moved on, even though I 'technically' did. I still thought of you, and Alice of course, every day. For the longest time you starred in my nightmares. You always held the same pained expression, and I always woke up crying. I am sorry Edward, and I never meant to hurt you. It's just, I cut off contact to be fair to you, and to save my sanity."

His hand grazed across my cheek slightly, before his eyes moved from mine.

"It's nice to hear your reasoning Bella, but I'm sorry—I don't know if I can do this. I want to be your friend so badly. I have missed you, but my heart is still broken. I am sorry Bella," with that he rose from the rocking chair, and moved toward my bedroom door. "It's good to have you home though." He added before he disappeared from my room. I felt the hot wet tears prick my eyelids, before they slowly cascaded down my face. This—I deserved.

* * *

**Special Shout-Out Thanks to:**

**Neverthink4  
Querida1607  
Twilightfangirlforever96  
Msmess21907  
Evernightforecast  
Spidermonkey-love  
Fiza1994**

**For the wonderful reviews. I really hope that you all enjoy the new chapter.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay, I know it's been a while since I updated, but I've been sooooooo busy lately. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'll try to update quicker next time!**

* * *

Chapter Three

Edwards Pov

Sitting and staring. That's all I can find that I can do right now. I shouldn't have been so hard on her. I should have gone easy on her. I should have been a good friend. I should have understood. She had a good reason, and her tears were proof enough that she missed me as much as I had missed her. That she had been having a hard time in Phoenix. I should have been easier on her. Why did I have to be a jackass?

"Hey bro. I just heard. Have you seen her?" Emmett asked as he sat down beside me.

I loved my older brother, but there were somethings that I didn't want to talk to him about. Bella Swan was one of those things. He wasn't really very close to her before she left. He saw what her leaving had done to me. He watched me slowly start to lose grip on reality for a while after I lost contact with her. So to say he's on any terms with Bella Swan would be an understatement.

"Yeah, I went over and talked to her," I sighed, a long and loud sigh.

"How'd that go?" he asked, his voice didn't give away the hate I know he felt for her, but his eyes did. Glowing with a redden fury, his usual crystal blue eyes were glowing with the fury he felt.

"I was so rotten to her Emmett. She explained everything. She was crying. She was hurting, and I was mean to her. I told her that I didn't think we could be friends. How could I be so cruel?" I asked, mostly talking to myself, but I knew he'd answer. I also knew what his answer would be, so I was ready to go on the defensive.

"What, you don't think she deserved for you to be mean to her? You don't think she deserved for you to hurt her feelings? Damn Edward, I didn't think you were this stupid, obviously though, I was wrong. Your a moron. She deserved much more than that. She deserves to see the pain she put you through. The hole in your heart where her place used to be. She deserves a hell of a lot more than her feelings hurt. You did go easy on her bro," he said, shaking his head as he stood up from my bed. "I can't believe she had the balls to come back here." He mumbled on his way out the door.

I sighed, a heavier sigh this time. Emmett was wrong, I knew he was wrong. I knew I was a monster. Who would intentionally hurt someone that they cared about, when they were already obviously hurting. I knew that I couldn't go back over there. Not yet, not when I couldnt' keep my emotions in check. I needed help, reinforcements, I needed Alice.

* * *

Bella's Pov

Wiping the next batch of tears from my red and swollen eyes, I let my fingers graze across the two photographs in my hand. One, a tattered and torn photograph. It was nearly ten years old, and with how many times I had taken it out of it's picture frame, it was a wonder that it was still in one piece. It was a much older photo of me and Edward. It was his eighth birthday party. That had been a good day. One that I could remember fairly well. It was memories like that one that got me through the days and nights in Phoenix.

Two little kids, their arms slung around each other. Hanging onto the other for dear life. Almost as if they let go, they might lose each other forever. If only those two little kids had known how much truth were in those words.

Then there was the newer photo. Me and my mom, just a week before her accident. I sniff, as more tears try to force themselves out. We had, had a mother-daughter picnic at the park near our house. We had found a passing stranger, and asked them to take a picture of us. This was my favorite photo of me and my mom, and it would be our last one. I missed my mom every single day. Not one day passes when my heart doesn't ache. Where the hole she left doesn't feel raw and sore. Now, not only do I have the hole that Edward unknowingly left behind, but I have the one that my mom left as well. I didn't feel like I was whole anymore. I was missing two of the biggest pieces of my life. Until I got at least one of those pieces back, I wouldn't feel whole again. Since it's nearly impossible for my mom to come back to me, I'll just have to win Edward's trust back. I know there is no way I'll come out of this stage in my life the same person I was, without his help. He was always my rock. He was always the one that held me up when I felt like I might just fall to pieces. He was my entire world, and I know that we were only little kids back then, but I knew that he was something special. Not just in general, but something special to me.

I raise my head as I hear a knock on my bedroom door. Secretly I hope it's Edward, although I'm nearly certain that it's not.

"Come in," I say simply, not really wanting to talk to anyone.

"Hey," I hear, the voice a cheery chirp and I notice it almost immediately.

"Hi Alice," I try to force a smile.

She can see through it though, as the expression on her face changes almost immediately.

"Edward said you weren't doing so well," she sighed, as she sat down next to me. "I just want to say this right off the bat. I wanted to be mad at you. I wanted to be pissed and furioius. I wanted to yell and scream, and tell you all the things that I thought you needed to know, but---" she paused, as she put her arm around my shoulder. I could feel myself giving into the temptation of the hot wet tears. "Seeing you like this. Hurting, in so much pain. I don't want to do anything but try to make you feel better. I didn't know you were hurting so much Bella. I'm so sorry about your mom, I know she meant the world to you."

Leave it to Alice to bring tears, to already tear-filled eyes. That was all it took. Just those words. Just haivng her arm around my shoulders, and her wanting to help, was all it took as my eyes sprang a new leak. I felt the tears slip down my cheeks, and tasted the saltiness of them on my lips.

"I am so sorry Alice--" I tried, but I knew that she wasn't going to make sense of much, of what I had to say. So I just decided to bury my face into her shoulder, as the tears slid easily down my cheek.

It felt like an enterity that I spent crying on Alice's shoulder. Once I realized that the fountian of tears had stopped, and Alice would be able to make sense of my words once again, I raised my head from her shoulders.

"I am so sorry that I hurt him, that I hurt you. That was never my--"

"I know. Edward told me what you said. He feels bad, knowing that he hurt you. Knowing that he made your pain worse. He wanted to tell you himself. He just wasn't sure that he could control his emotions just yet. It's been so hard on him Bella. I'm not saying that to make you feel bad, please don't think that I'm saying that to make you feel bad. It's just—his heart always belonged to you Bella, and when you stopped writing—He almost lost it. We all thought that he was going to try to hurt himself for the longest time. He used to lock himself in his room for hours at a time. He stopped eating for a couple of months. We all thought we were going to lose him. I just—I thought you should know," Alice's eyes refused to meet mine.

"I didn't realize that by not writing back, that I would hurt him that badly. That was never what I wanted. I stopped to help him. I just—I could feel the pain in each word that he wrote to me. It felt like a hundred tiny knives stabbing me in the heart. I just—I figured that if one of us was strong enough to cut off communication that it would be better for both of us," I sighed, as I let my eyes drift down to the floor. I was ashamed of myself. How could I hurt him so deeply and not realize it.

"It's okay Bella. He wants to forgive you, and he will. It's all about time. He just needs some time. Now that we got all the awkward stuff out of the way, how's about I catch you up on all the things happening in Forks?" she asked, a wicked grin that was so Alice that it scared me.

"Should I be afraid?" I asked her, my eyebrow cocked slightly.

"Miminally," she smiled at me, her arm still slung around my shoulders. For the first time since my plane landed, I felt comfortable. Almost like I belonged. I knew this feeling wouldn't last. I would start school, I would see Edward everyday. Along with everyone else that probably blames me for Edward losing his mind for a short period of time. I would take this normacly and not think twice about feeling good even if just for a little while. I needed something good. Especially now.

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**Special Shout-Out Thanks to:**

**BellaLuna04**

**BeachesGrl**

**Neverthink4**

**Khockeygrl4**

**For the kind reviews.**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

This was hell, or probably as close as I'd come to it right now. I had been listening to Alice drone on and on about our 'friends' lives, and what's been going on since I've been gone. I really didn't care. The only reason I hung out with those 'drones' of human beings in the first place was the fact that Alice insisted that we had diversity in our little group.

Apparently Mike Newton, captain of the jerks, is dating Jessica Stanley, captain of the cheer sluts. Big frigging deal. I felt like making gagging noises as she went into detail on how their relationship came about, and what a big deal it was at school. She really should know me better. She should know that I wouldn't give a damn who is dating who, unless it involved someone I cared about. Like her, or Edward.

Oh the pain at the thought. Is that bad? Does that make me a bad person? To not want him to be with someone else? To not want him to be with someone that could make him happy? I think it does. I think it makes me a terrible person. Obviously I'm not that person for him. I mean he can't even be my friend right now, how could I even expect that he'd ever want anything more than that?

I just wanted to slap myself. To scream and yell at myself. Tell myself just how incredibly stupid I am for thinking these thoughts. Although I was certain that would draw much unwanted attention from Alice, and to explain these thoughts. Oh the horror, the horror.

"So, wanna know who I'm dating?" Alice's chipper voice broke into my thoughts.

Someone I cared about, actually had a life. This was great, although if she's got a boyfriend, does that mean that she won't wanna spend as much time hanging out with her lonely almost ex-best friend?

"Of course I do," I fake a smile, and she sees right through it.

"At least your trying to be upbeat. It's a step up," she grinned, as she shook my shoulder playfully. "Remember Edward's best friend—before you of course?"

I did remember Edward's other best friend. His unruly curly blond hair was unmistakable. I was almost certain that if I saw him today I'd still recognize him.

"Yeah, Jasper right?" I asked as if I didn't remember every tiny little detail of my former life.

"Yeah, Jasper Hale. So cute. I think it might be the real thing Bella. I mean he's so—there aren't words to describe the way I feel about Jasper," she sighed contently as she trailed off.

I realized as she was attempted to describe her love for Jasper, that I felt a similar type of feeling for Edward. Even if we really weren't on the best of speaking terms, I still felt like words couldn't describe the way I felt. This realization though, probably wasn't the best to make, in my current situation. I could feel the tears prick my eyelids again, as I tried my best to hold them back.

"Bella, what's wrong?" she asked me. Damn Alice and her prospectiveness.

"It's really nothing. I'm just being a girl," I sighed, I knew she wouldn't buy that.

"Yeah, right. What's really wrong?" she asked, her eyebrow cocked slightly. She'd lost all playfulness.

"Just thinking about Edward—feelings stuff," I mumbled it altogether, hoping she wouldn't catch that last bit.

"Feelings?" of course that's my luck. Of everything I said, she had to pick up on the one word I didn't want her to.

"Yeah, it's just—when you were trying to describe your feelings for Jasper. It's just—that's how I feel about Edward. I know that it's wrong and that I shouldn't. I know that I'm not even his favorite person. Hell, I know that I don't even deserve to be his friend after everything I screwed up. It's just, I can't help the way I feel," I sighed, my eyes fixed on the floor. I couldn't' find the courage to look up at her. I could feel her eyes on me.

"Bella, are you trying to tell me that your in love with my brother?" she asked, her voice just above a whisper, almost like we were telling secrets.

"I think so," I mumbled softly.

"Bella you have to tell him," she said, her voice was growing a little louder now.

"I can't Alice! I want him to come to me, to talk to me because he wants to. Not because of stupid feelings that I feel. I don't want him to feel forced," I sighed, I knew she'd know I was right.

"Your right, I'm sorry. I won't say anything I swear," she said, as she squeezed my shoulder softly.

I knew she wasn't lying. She wouldn't tell him, my secret was safe with her.

"Now, Jasper Hale huh?" I smiled as convincingly as I could manage.

"Yes, and he's so cute too Bella. You'd really like him," she smiled back, she knew I was trying my best.

"That's so great Alice, he always seemed like a really nice guy. So what's Emmett up to?" I asked about the eldest of the Cullen siblings mainly because I would have felt bad if I didn't. Emmett never really took to me very well. He never really ever 'like' liked me. He just kind of dealt with my presence.

"He's dating Jasper's twin sister, Rosalie. They're actually living with us right now--" she trailed off, almost like it was against some major rule to tell me what was going on.

"What do you mean living with you?" I asked, watching her reaction to see if it was some family secret.

"Well, they really didn't want anyone outside of the family knowing, but considering you've been family since you were seven then I guess I can tell you. Their parents were in an accident. They didn't make it—It's a really long story. It appears though that Jazz's parents put in their will that they wanted custody of Jazz and Rose to go to my parents. So, of course my parents took them in. Poor Jazz, he tries to put on a good show, but I know he's hurting, and Rose—well she's Rose," Alice sighed heavily, and I knew that she was feeling the pain that Jasper was feeling.

"I'm so sorry Alice. Here I am whining about my life problems, and your having your own problems. I'm all ears," I felt horrible. I seriously needed to be quarantined or something. I needed to be kept far away from other humans.

"Don't feel bad Bella. I mean Jazz means the world to me, but you lost your mother. You and Jazz should really talk, I think you could help each other. Your going through the same thing right now. It might help to talk to someone going through the same thing," Alice said, smiling softly at me, before hugging me tightly. "I'll always love you like a sister Bella. Even though you hurt Edward—and myself. Your still family. You still mean the world to me—and Edward too, even if he doesn't wanna admit it right now. If you need anything, don't hesitant to ask."

"Thanks Alice, that means the world to me. Especially now," I smiled a real genuine smile this time.

"Look I gotta go, Edward's probably waiting for an update. Plus Jazz is probably having a slight meltdown, I forgot to tell him I was leaving. He's having a slight problem with separation right now. Look, if you need to talk, I'm just a phone call away," she smiled and winked at me, before disappearing out of my room.

For the first time since I got back, I felt hope. I felt hope for the future. I felt hope for myself, but most of all I felt hope that sometime in the near future Edward Cullen would talk to me again.

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**Special Shout-Out Thanks to:**

**Jenny0305**

**For the kind review. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay...I know this one is a bit on the short side. I had a bit of trouble getting this chapter to come out right. The next chapter will be longer, and will be introducing Bella's "boyfriend" Jacob. Let the drama ensue :D. **

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Chapter Five

Torture. That's the only way to describe the past week. Like hell on earth, only worse. It's bad enough that everyone at school gives me dirty looks, and whispers behind my back. That isn't even the worse. I can handle that. Hell I expected that. No. It's the way that _he_ looks at me. Not only does it send a shiver down my spine because he's looking at me. It also made me want to curl up in a ball and cry, because I can see the pain he tries to hide in his eyes. At least Alice tried—which of course, tried being the operative word. She tried being my friend. Tried to talk to me at least once a day. I let her off the hook though. I saw the pained expression on Edward's face every time that Alice would come talk to me, and I felt my heart break all over again.

She tried to tell me that it wasn't what it looked like, and that he was upset with himself, not me. I didn't really believe her though. Why should he be upset with himself? I did get to meet Alice's boyfriend—well technically re-introduce myself to him, since I had met him back in the day. Jasper seemed like a really great guy, and he was super sweet. I really think that me and him could be friends, and I do think Alice was right. I think that we could help each other through our problems. Sighing, I throw my book bag over my shoulder, and cringe, my only class with Edward, and it was always so awkward. I walk through the door of the classroom, and watch as every person in the room glares at me until I sit down. My eyes automatically lock onto my desk. At least if I didn't look back then I could imagine that they weren't glaring at me.

"Hey," I hear the familiar musical voice, and my head jerks up.

He's not only sitting beside me, but he's talking to me. I find it very weird since he hasn't said two words to me at all this week. I try to hide the shock on my face, by forcing a smile in it's place. After a whole week of silence, I can't believe that he's finally talking to me again. My heart wanted to flutter out of my chest, and my stomach was doing back flips.

"Hey," I answer back, thankfully without stamming over my words.

"Look, I wanted to apologize for—well acting like I have," he sighed, as he leaned forward, laying his head against his arms, his head turning toward me. His emerald eyes blazing into my chocolate brown ones.

"There's nothing to apologize for," I sighed, I knew I deserved the torture he put me through. Although I didn't complain to Alice about his lack of contact with me. I did explain that it was hurtful.

"Yes there is. There was no reason for me to act that way. You apologized to me for what you did. I shouldn't torture you like that. It was wrong of me, I know that. I'm sorry," his voice sounded almost pained. If only he knew how badly it hurt me to hear the pain in his voice.

"I accept your apology, but there isn't anything for you to apologize for. You have every right to torture me. I deserve it. I hurt you so badly, no matter if I meant to or not..." I let my sentence trail off, as my cellphone started to vibrate in my pocket.

Slowly, I pulled it out, and held it under my desk so that the teacher couldn't see it. I read the text message quietly to myself, as my eye widen with each word.

"Good or bad message?" he asked, his voice sounding alarmed at my widen eyes.

"Both, I think," I sighed, as I laid my head against my desk, letting it's coolness calm me down.

"What does that mean?" his voice remaining a whisper, but I could hear the double meaning in it.

"It was from my friend back in Phoenix--" I let my sentence trail off. I really didn't want to admit to this next part. "Apparently my boyfriend—or well---sort of ex-boyfriend, is coming here to visit me."

"Is he like—stalking you? Has he hurt you?" the concern in his voice lit my heart on fire, maybe he did really care.

"No—not really," I shook my head. Jake could have a temper, and could get angry easily, but he hadn't 'technically' hurt me.

"I'm here, remember that," he winked at me, before flashing me his crooked smile that made my heart flutter, and my knees feel weak.

"Thanks Edward," I forced myself to smile back at him. It wasn't easy, what with the feeling of dread falling hard upon me. While I said that Jake hadn't hurt me, he has hurt other guys that ever showed any interest in me—at all. I also knew that if Jake saw me hanging out with Edward—or hell Jasper for that matter, it would not end well. I laid my head back down on my desk, hoping for the coolness to keep the anxiety from eating me alive. If anything, anything at all, happened to Edward it would be my fault. There would be no way I could forgive myself. I had to bite my lip to keep from crying. That's what I needed to alarm Edward anymore than he already was.

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**Special Shout-Out Thanks to:**

**Tomy-Cullen**

**Becky1993**

**Jenny0305**

**Barkerfaith**

**Pixienotafairy**

**For the Kind Reviews!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay I know it's been a while since I've updated. I've been really sick for like friggin ever, and I'm just now starting to feel better. I hope this chapter will help make up for it though. **

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Chapter Six

Have you ever had the feeling that your being watched? Well I have—I am. At this moment, I feel like someone is staring at me. It could be a slight paranoia due to the fact that Jacob's coming, or not. Either way, I don't like the feeling. I glance up quickly, and notice that no one is looking at me. No one was even bothering to stop and glare at me, like usual. I felt thankful for that. I wasn't sure how much more staring I could take. It was really starting to become bothersome. I tried being a good sport about it. I knew I had earned it, but it had been long enough. Shouldn't all of the glaring be out of their systems by now?

I grumbled slightly to myself, as I tossed my backpack over my shoulder. I was running behind as it was, and if I didn't hurry up, Charlie would beat me home. That's all I needed, was for Charlie to start worrying.

"Hey pip-squeak," I hear a slightly familiar booming voice, as I feel my book bag slip from my shoulder and onto the floor.

"Thanks Emmett," the sarcasm drips from my lips like acid. To say that he's taken to me being back well, would be the biggest lie of the century.

I knelt to the ground. I was now wishing I had zipped up my backpack.

"Hey, sorry bout Em, he's—well he's Emmett," I hear my favorite musical voice say.

I turn my head to face him, and notice that he's kneeling beside me. Our faces merely inches apart from each other. I feel the ache to lean in, to kiss his full lips, but I fight it. No need to ruin the friendship that he has so kindly started back up with me.

"No problem. Emmett never really was my number one fan anyways," I forced a smile, and knew he knew it was fake almost immediately.

"Should I be worried about you?" he asked suddenly. His green eyes blazing with intensity.

I felt my heart thump in my chest at the intense look of worry in his eyes. He truly did care about me. I wouldn't let myself hope that it was anything more than just the bonds from our friendship shining through though.

"Worried? Why?" I ask, trying to play dumb. I knew he wouldn't buy it though.

"Bella, you've been acting like the world is coming to an end since you found out that, that Jacob kid is coming here. Now, is he bad news or not?" Edward asked, I could tell that he was losing his patience, so instead of losing his friendship, I decided to come clean.

"You shouldn't be worried about me—you should be worried about you," I sighed, unable to look him in the eye.

"Why?" he asked, his voice much calmer now, as he pushed my backpack into my waiting hand.

"Because Jacob is a bit—territorial. Even though I broke up with him before I left Phoenix—he's not the kind of guy that catches hints easily. He put a guy in the hospital for giving me a hug—The guy was my friend's brother. He's a bit of a hot head. I don't want you—or Jasper for that matter, getting hurt because of me," I sighed, as I felt his index finger lift my chin up so that I would look at him.

"I'm not afraid of Jacob. Territorial or not. I just now got my friend back, and I'm not gonna stop hanging out with her just because this Jacob kid is coming. Unless—you don't wanna hang out with me--"

"Of course I do Edward!" My voice boomed much louder than it needed to, and his crooked smile gave that fact away.

"Great, because I've missed you Isabella Swan. It's great to have you home—sorry it took me so long to come around," he winked at me, before offering me his hand.

I waved my hand at him, dismissing his apology, "No need for apologies, or did you forget that already?" I teased him.

That crooked smile was plastered on his face, and I couldn't help but smile with him. We started walking side by side toward the door that would release us from our prison for the weekend. He stopped and turned slightly toward me, the smile still firmly in place.

"Sorry—I forgot," he said, trying to fake seriousness, replacing the smile with a half grim expression.

"That's alright—just try not to let it happen--"

"Isabella Swan!"

My eyes widened at the sound of the husky voice calling my name. Unfortunately we were out in the parking lot of the school—alone. Thanks to Emmett, we were the last ones out of the school. I dropped my arm that was looped around Edward's, half frozen, I turned halfway toward the voice. Sure enough, Jacob Black—all six-foot seven of him, stood broodingly behind us. His eyes were not friendly.

"Uh—hey Jake," my voice cracked, giving away my fear.

"Who the hell is this?" his voice boomed louder. He was furious.

"Hi! I'm Edward Cullen. I'm one of Bella's best friends. You must be Jacob," Edward smiled friendly at Jacob, extending his hand.

"Yeah, well key word that you need to latch onto—Edward is it? Is that you _**were**_ best friends. That's over with now. Bella doesn't have 'boyfriends'. Your no longer needed," his voice was abrupt, and the way he stated his last sentence would have made any regular, normal guy stalk away. Not Edward though.

"I'm sorry Jacob, but me and Bella go back—Like way back. So I'm not going anywhere. You, however, are more than free to go wherever you'd like," Edward kept his friendly smile in place, even though the tone of his voice bit back.

"I really don't want to have to kick your ass. I'd hate to have to hurt you. It would be best for you to just excuse yourself from Bella's life. Just go back to how it was, before she came back. _**We**_ don't need _**you**_ anymore," Jacob was now standing inches from Edward's face. Although technically he was bending down so that he could look Edward in the eye.

"What part of I'm not going anywhere, do you not understand?" Edward asked, his voice growing angrier by the minute.

I felt the need to jump between them, and tell Jacob to leave Edward alone, but I figured that would only make things worse.

"I'm sorry buddy, you got a problem with my brother?" I heard the familiar husky voice, and had never been happier to have Emmett around.

Jacob sneered, as he turned his head in the direction of the voice. He shrank back only slightly once he noticed Emmett's broodingly large size.

"I would just like for your brother to leave my girlfriend alone," Jacob's voice was calm.

Emmett, almost unwillingly, turned toward me. "This guy your boyfriend?"

"No. I broke up with him before I left Phoenix," I sighed, my head hanging afraid to look at Jacob.

"Only cause she had to move out—here," I could hear the scowl on Jacob's face as he spoke.

"Don't matter. Bella here, broke up with you. You have no claim on her. I think my brother has any claim he wants on her. What do you think Edward?" Emmett asked, flashing his brother a sly smile.

Edward smiled back, as he threw his arm over my shoulders and pulled me into his side. This wasn't going to end well, and one of them was going to get hurt. Jacob growled at the physical contact.

"Look Jacob—we're over. It's done. I don't have those kind of feelings for you, I'm sorry. Please, just leave me alone," I sighed. None of it was a lie, I didn't love Jacob, not as anything more than a friend, but I knew that he couldn't stay here and be my friend, and not behave around Edward.

"This isn't over," he growled, as his face was merely inches from mine, his eyes were dark, almost black with hatred, and I felt myself shrink into Edward's side.

"Don't worry, he won't touch you. I'll protect you," he said against my hair.

"I'll make sure that little puke don't touch one hair on either one of your heads," Emmett said, before laughing gruffly. "Oh, by the way. Sorry I've been kind of a jerk. I just needed to know you weren't going to break my little brother's heart again."

With that he smiled as he stalked off toward a red converterable with a stunningly beautiful blond in the front seat.

"Need a ride home?" Edward asked me, and I was so glad at this moment that I was still without a vehicle.

"That would be great Edward, thanks," I smiled at him, as he lead the way toward a shiny, silver Volvo at the far end of the parking lot. Even though my life could be in danger from my ex-boyfriend, I felt happy for the first time in years. I finally had Edward back in my life. That was enough to make anyone happy.

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**Special Shout Out Thanks to:**

**Freakylittlepixie**

**Jenny0305**

**Twilight86**

**ILYTwilight**

**For the kind reviews**


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry for the long wait on this chapter. I've been super busy! I hope that you guys enjoy this, and I uh—had an idea that will take this story in a different direction.**

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Chapter Seven

**Bella's Pov**

I curled into myself, as I sobbed. I can't believe I was so weak. I should have known better than to go out alone with _him_ still in town. Of course he was still in town—he transferred here. How he ever talked his parents into that, I'll never know.

The phone on my night stand vibrated loudly. That was the tenth call from Edward that I had ignored. I couldn't see him like this. Not after I had worked so hard to keep our relationship completely platonic, now though, any thoughts that I might have had of more than friendship with Edward was over. I was now considered damaged goods. Why would he want that? Want me?

"Bells, Edward's on the phone for ya," Charlie called from the kitchen.

I sighed, I knew I couldn't go down there looking like I did. He'd know something wasn't right. I also knew that Edward would know that something was right with the fact that I was still sobbing. Shrugging off the blanket that covered my body, I got up and walked to my bedroom door.

"I'm about to hop into the shower. Tell him I'll call him back when I get out."

It wasn't the truth, but then again I couldn't say. I can't talk to him because I'm sobbing like a weak little girl. So a lie would have to work. Now I had to go through the motions of showering otherwise he'd know that I was lying.

I turned around and grabbed my nighttime attire, and my toiletries, and headed for the bathroom. Closing, and locking the door behind me, I threw my bag on the counter top, before walking forward and twisting the hot water on full blast. If I was going to shower it would be to wash the feeling from me. It had been a day, and I had showered so many times that I couldn't count and I could still smell and feel Jacob all over me.

I shrugged out of my clothes. The shirt was slightly damp from all the crying. Throwing them on the floor, not even caring. I stepped into the full flowing water, and felt as it scalded my skin, turning it red almost automatically.

* * *

"_Hold still. This doesn't have to be difficult Bella. It's just—It's time I mark my territory. He needs to know that you BELONG to me." _

_His breath was hot against the skin of my neck, and he all but ripped my shirt from my body. I felt so weak and exposed. I wanted to fight back. I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to do something, but I couldn't. I was frozen. I had never seen Jake like this. He had always been such a sweet guy. He had always reminded me of Edward like that. Then there—thinking his name. Thinking how upset he would be at me not fighting back. Of me letting Jacob take advantage of me like this. _

"_I SAID HOLD STILL! What has he done to you? He's turned you into a squirmy bitch." _

I only now realized that the water had gone cold, and that I was curled up in the far corner of the tub. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. No matter how many times I tried to not think of what he did to me, it seemed to be the only thing left in my mind. I only vaguely heard the light tapping on the door.

"Bells you didn't hurt yourself did you?" Charlie's worried voice boomed through the wooden door easily.

I scrambled up as quickly as I possibly could.

"No—just lost track of time," I called, hoping he couldn't hear the tears in my voice.

"K' Alice called—their worried about you Bells." I heard his feet start down the stairs, and knew that he wasn't waiting around for an answer.

A call wouldn't do it. I'd have to go—I swallowed a lump that was stuck in my throat—see Edward. Not that my appearance would let him know that everything was hunky dory. Quite the opposite—I needed him to know. I needed someone to know. I couldn't keep this locked up anymore.

I climbed quickly from the bathtub, yanking on my clothes as I went. I grabbed my hair brush. Not that I cared what my hair looked like—but at the same time—I did. I yanked it through the matted pieces of hair in the back of my head. I whimpered softly as the bristles hit the sore spot where Jacob had beat my head against the brick wall to help hold me still. I didn't even think to brush my teeth or well—frankly anything else. I just needed to cry on someone's shoulder.

I took a couple of deep breaths at the top of the stairs—trying to keep the tears at bay until I could get out of the house. Then I could cry at will. Luckily Edward lived right across the street, so I wouldn't have to drive. I was happy that my father was engrossed in a baseball game, so I simply called over my shoulder.

"Gonna see Edward."

"Not too long honey," he called back, but I was half-way out the door.

* * *

I all but ran across the street, not even bothering to check and see if traffic was coming, and ran up the three short steps to his front door. I begged for him—and only him to answer the door.

"Bells?" his voice was so familiar that the tears came more freely now. "What's wrong?"

"He—he—ra--raped--me," I sobbed out, as I fell into his arms—my world going black.

* * *

**Big Shout Out Thanks To:**

**Jenny0305**

**FRK921**

**yesisalas**

**LittleMissJayme**

**For the Kind Reviews**


	8. Chapter 8

**Hope you enjoy. Get's a little graphic—you've been warned. **

* * *

Chapter Eight

**Edward's POV**

I couldn't believe that Bella has been dodging my phone calls all day. In fact, I hadn't seen much of her for a couple of days. She didn't go to school at all yesterday or today. I've been really worried that something might be wrong with her. I'd never known Bella to miss school—ever. After about the tenth time that she didn't answer though, I called the house phone. Charlie would get her to talk to me. Even that didn't work though. She claimed to be taking a shower, and that she'd call back. Maybe she'd talk to Alice.

"Alice—could you call Bells? I'm worried about her," I sighed, as I toyed with my leftover food. I hadn't really touched much of it, and didn't have plans to either.

"Yeah. She still hasn't answered?" she asked, looking at me from the corner of her eyes.

"No. I even called the house phone, but she told Charlie that she was going to shower and call me later—I think she's avoiding me."

"Hand me the phone," she said, without even making eye contact.

I handed her the phone, and she quickly dialed Bella's house number. I waited through one, two, three rings before Charlie answered again.

"Is Bella out of the shower?" Alice asked, her voice sounded slightly annoyed, and it pissed me off.

"No, sorry. In fact, I should probably check on her. I'll tell her you called though," he said before hanging up.

That was odd. I'd never known Charlie having to check on Bella while she showered before. Was she sick? She had seemed find a few days ago.

"I'm sure she'll call Edward."

Alice's non-nonchalance about Bella's odd behavior was starting to really upset me. So I decided to upset her. I got a wicked grin on my face, as I got up from the kitchen table, emptying my plate. I walked slowly into the living room, plopping down next to Alice on the couch where there wasn't really room for me, and snatched the remote out of her tiny little hands.

"Edward," she whined as I put her favorite show on mute.

"Well, maybe if you cared about Bells a bit more—maybe I wouldn't have to stoop to quite so extreme lows," I sighed, as did she. She knew I had a point, and I saw in her face that she gave up.

"Your right. I should be more worried. It really isn't like her to act--"

She didn't get to finish her sentence, because of a tiny knock on the door. I threw the remote into her lap, as I jumped up from the couch, and nearly ran to the front door, praying it was Bella. I yanked the door out of my way. The happy expression that was on my face left almost immediately. Bella looked like hell. I felt my stomach churn, but I forced the bile to stay put.

"Bella?" I questioned, hoping it was someone that looked eerily like my best friend.

"H-he-ra-raped me," she said, as she fell into my arms. I grabbed her up, and saw that she was unconscious. I didn't know if she meant now—or back in Phoenix—or what.

I backed up a little bit, shutting the door before turning toward my family. Alice's face was shocked, and Jasper held her tightly into his side. My mom appeared from the kitchen, her hand over her mouth to keep from screaming. Emmett looked at me, fury on his face. He might not be Bella's biggest fan, but he didn't want to see her a crumpled mess in my arms.

"What happened?" Alice's voice was tiny, coming from behind Jasper.

"He raped her," I spat the words out like they tasted bad in my mouth.

I saw tears glisten in both Alice and Esme's eyes. Emmett and Jasper both growled.

"I'll—make sure—your father—checks her out," my mom said, in between tiny sobs.

"Take her to my room, let her sleep it off," Alice spoke softly.

I nodded my head, as I headed slowly toward Alice's room. I didn't want to jostle Bella too much. I laid her down on the bed, and pulled up the small desk chair, and sat by the bed. I wouldn't leave her side until either she woke up, or my dad came to check her over.

* * *

**Bella's POV**

I shuddered, and screamed before my eyes opened. The first thing I noticed, as I tried to calm my breathing, was that it was now daylight. The second thing I noticed was that I wasn't in my room. In fact the room I was in looked a lot of like Alice's room. That when I remembered the last thing I did before I passed out.

"Bells, you okay?" Edward's worried voice came from the door. I looked toward him, his eyes were red-rimmed, like he hadn't slept at all.

"Bad dream," I muttered. More like nightmare—only reality.

"My dad would like to talk to you—are you up to it?" he asked.

"Will you stay with me?" I asked, I knew I sounded pitiful, but I didn't ever wanna be without Edward ever again.

"Of course," he said, as he waved in Carlisle, before sitting down beside me on the bed. He grabbed one of my hands in his, and rubbed soothing circles on it.

"Bella—can you tell me what happened?" Carlisle asked softly.

I shook my head softly, taking a breath.

"He trapped me—shoved me into an alley. He shoved against one of the buildings. He said that he had to 'mark his territory.' That he needed Edward to know that I 'belonged' to him. He used one arm to lock me in place here," I stopped pointing to the soft bruising just under my chin, right above my chest. I felt Edward intake a breath, and shiver, as I continued. "He kept telling me to hold still, but I couldn't just stand there and let him—do that to me. I couldn't—not fight back. So to help me hold still, he grabbed a hold of my shoulders, and pulled me toward him, before slamming me against the brick wall behind me. My head made a sickening sound when it made contact, and I thought I might lose consciousness. I almost wish I had. He started to rip the clothes from my body--"

I couldn't go on. Carlisle knew where I was headed. He shook his head.

"Bella—I'm going to have to examine you. I can either do that here, or I can do it in the hospital. Wherever you feel more comfortable," he said softly, his hand was on my shoulder, comforting me.

"Here—please," I all but begged.

"Yes, of course. Let me grab my bag—do you care if Esme helps me?" he asked.

"Can Edward stay?" I asked, shaking my head at the same time, telling him I didn't care.

"Of course—if your comfortable with that," he said, before disappearing out of the room.

Edward pulled me into his arms, and held me tightly against his chest.

"Bella, why didn't you tell me sooner?" he crooned, as his hand brushed my hair softly.

I cried softly into his chest, "Because I was afraid you wouldn't want me. Why would you? I'm damaged now."

I didn't mean to say so much, but Edward always had a way to make me speak more than I intend to.

"Of course I want you, Always. Your my best friend, always have been, always will be," he crooned.

"Thank you," I spoke softly.

"Okay Bella, first off, I need to take pictures of any bruises or marks that he put on you," Carlisle's voice came from the door.

I sighed, as I stood up, and pulled down the collar of my shirt to expose just how large the bruise under my chin really was. Carlisle snapped a couple of pictures of it, and waited. I pulled the sleeves of my shirt up to expose to large hand mark bruises on my forearms. He snapped a couple more pictures. I looked at Edward to see if he was going to be comfortable with what I would have to do next. He just simply shook his head, as I removed my shirt. Two more dark purple bruises where on my shoulders from where Jacob had grabbed me. Two more bright flashes, as he snapped pictures. I turned around to show the huge bruise, and the tiny cuts from where my back hit and scraped against the brick wall. He took a couple of pictures, and I heard Esme whimper from her place beside him. I turned back around to face Carlisle.

"That's all—from the upper part," I said, as I slid my shirt back on.

"Are there more bruises--" his voice trailed off.

I closed my eyes to try and stop the tears, as I shook my head.

"I—need to see them," he didn't sound happy. In fact it almost sounded like he was trying to keep his voice from raising any louder.

I just shook my head, before looking up at Edward, tears in my eyes, as he shook his head. I slid my pants down, and showed the bruises on the inner side of my thighs. I heard three intakes of breath, and a couple of flashes of light.

"Okay---I need you to lay down Bella," he said softly.

I did as he asked, and laid down on Alice's bed. I tried to keep my mind off of Carlisle, and concentrated on Edward holding my hand. I tried to keep my breathing even, and the tears out of my eyes. I didn't want to upset Edward anymore than I already had.

"Ssshhh Sweet Bella," Edward crooned in my ear, before kissing my forehead.

It wasn't long before Carlisle stood up.

"Okay Bella, I'm finished. It'll be a few days before I get the results back. With how long it's been—I'm sorry, but I can't offer you the morning after pill---you'll need to be checked for—other medical things in a few weeks--"

Edward's eyes grew wide, as I finally realized what Carlisle meant.

"I could be—pregnant? With Jacob's child?" I asked, as I felt bile raised in my throat.

"It's a possibility Bella---I am so sorry," he said, as he patted my shoulder before leaving the room.

"I swear to god! I will kill him with my own hands," Edward's voice roared behind me.

I shivered and shuddered, as Edward pulled me into his chest.

"You'll be safe with me. I'm never leaving your side Bells, never," and I was instantly comforted, I snuggled in to his chest, and closed my eyes, hopefully Edward would keep the bad dreams away.

* * *

**Special Shout-Out Thanks to:**

**Taylah**

**RosalieTheBeautyQueen**

**FRK921**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

**Bella's POV**

I could feel myself shaking, and I knew the screaming wasn't far behind. I was no longer aware of Edward's warm body laying next to me, or the fact that I was in the Cullen house. The scream that tore through the room would have woken the people down the street.

"Bella! Wake up!" I heard Edward's frantic voice. "Please. Tell me how to help you."

I forced my eyes open, and took in the sight around me. Edward was half laying down, half kneeling over me. His hands were on either one of my shoulders, ready to shake me awake. I wanted to force words out of my mouth. Something to reassure him. Although I was certain that my voice would break, and I was also certain that, that wouldn't reassure him.

"Bella, please tell me how to help you," this time his voice was breaking, and when he looked at me, I saw the tears in his eyes. I was hurting him, and I wasn't even meaning to.

"I'm sorry," I got the words out, barely above a whisper. I was almost certain he didn't hear me.

That was until his eyes turned cold. His liquid green eyes, suddenly turned solid. The look on his face utterly frighten me.

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked me, his voice was as hard and cold as his eyes appeared to look.

"Because I'm hurting you! I didn't mean too, I swear--"

His hand covered my mouth. I tried to speak around it but nothing sounded right, so I gave up.

"Do not apologize Bella! He is the one that needs to apologize. He deserves to go to prison for what he did to you!" With that he hugged me to his chest. "In fact—I'm sorry Bella. I'm sorry for what he did to you. I'm sorry that I couldn't stop it from happening. I am sorry that I couldn't save you from this pain. I am so sorry."

The last one came out as more of a sob then I think he meant for it to. I nuzzled into his chest further, enjoying the safe feeling I felt whenever Edward was near me. I wanted for him to never leave my side again. I wanted to never lose this feeling.

"No apologies needed from you--" I whispered against his chest, sighed deeply before continuing. "Just—promise me you'll never leave me."

I felt his fingertips caressing my cheek, as he lifted my face to look at him.

"I swear to never leave you. I promise that no one will ever hurt you like that—ever again," he said, as he started to rock the both of us back and forth. I heard him humming a light tune in the back of his throat.

"Thank you," I said, as I yawned quietly.

"For?" he questioned lightly.

"For being you. For being Edward. For being my best friend," I said, as I sat up on his bed.

"That is something you don't need to thank me for," he smiled my favorite crooked smile, and I couldn't' help but to smile back. I nestled my head on his shoulder, as we both stared out the window together.

* * *

**Edward's POV**

I let my hand rub soothing circles on her back. I wanted to make all the bad things in her life go away. I wanted to kill Jacob Black, and I wanted to tell Bella that I was in love with her. I would, however, wait for that last bit of information. I knew that she probably wouldn't take to that much physical contact so soon. I couldn't blame her. It made me angry just to think of how badly injured she would be if she had kept fighting him. Would he have let her survive?

"Where's your mind at?" I heard her low, soft voice break into my thoughts.

I forced a smile on my lips and answered with as much truth as possible. "You."

"Oh--" she cut herself off.

I've always hated when she did that. She drove me crazy doing stuff like that. Starting to say something, but then stopping.

"All good things, I can assure you," my smile was a little more genuine.

"Well, I suppose that does help," a small teasing smile crossed her lips, and I felt my heart start to race. I hope she couldn't pick up on the change in my heart rhythm.

"Where's your mind at?" I asked her, trying to keep a teasing, light tone.

"On things it shouldn't be on," her voice was barely a whisper, and I had to strain just to hear the words.

She must be thinking about what _**he**_ did to her.

"He will pay Bells. I promise you that much," I sighed as I kissed the top of her head.

We'd always been sentimental like that. Sharing little things like, 'friendly hugs' and kisses on the forehead or crown of the head. Well, at least I did the last ones. Poor Bella couldn't reach the top of my head even if she tried.

"Please. Eddie, don't get hurt," I felt the pain in her voice and I just wanted to hug her to my chest and never let her go. I just wanted to tell her how much she meant to me.

"I got backup. Don't worry Bells," I sighed a deeper sigh.

Me, Emmett, and Jasper had already talked about how we were going to make Jacob Black pay for what he did to Bells. While Emmett had never really liked Bella, but he wasn't going to stand for what Jacob did to her.

I felt her body shake, and I had the suspicion that she was crying.

"Oh, my sweet Bella. Please don't cry," I felt the tears welling up in my eyes.

Bella had always been a soft spot for me. When we were kids, and Lauren had been so mean to Bella until she cried. I cried with her.

"I don't want any of you to get hurt—over me--"

"What he did to you, was not right. So we're going to make sure he knows that, then my dad is going to turn in your report to the police--"

"NO!" she jumped away from me. Her eyes were wide with shock. "You can't! Promise!"

"He's got to Bella. It's his job," I didn't understand why she was freaking out so bad over it.

"But—Charlie will know," her eyes were still wide, and I finally realized what had freaked her out. She didn't want her dad to know that Jacob had taken advantage of her like that.

"Bella—look at me," I said softly, I placed my thumb under her chin to make her look at me. "If my dad doesn't report this. He will lose his job. You don't want that do you?"

"No, of course not--"

"I will help you with Charlie, I promise. If it gets to bad, then your always welcome here, know that," I said, my eyes gazing into hers. I could feel the electricity flow through us, and wondered if she could feel it too. Without thinking, I leaned forward, and pressed my lips gently to hers.

* * *

**Special Shout-Out Thanks To:**

**Rosaliethebeautyqueen**

**FRK921**

**For the kind reviews**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

**Bella's POV**

I took in the feel of his lips on mine. The feeling rushing through me, traumatic incident or not, where not something I was used to. I had never felt such strong feelings, of needing and wanting a person in my life. I wound my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me. I just needed him, to feel close to him. I shoved everything that didn't evolve the here and now from my mind, as I relaxed completely in Edward's arms. After a few breaks, long enough to take in a breath here or there, Edward finally pulled away.

I stared up at his green eyes. I saw the lust and longing in them. In that moment I saw that he wanted me, just as badly as I wanted him. I felt a shiver run the length of my spine. Was I ready for something like this? Could I really give myself, my whole self to him? I wasn't sure. I didn't want to hurt him though. The thought of losing him again, after everything that's happened, made my stomach churn.

"I'm sorry--"

"No, I'm sorry Bells. I shouldn't have done that. It was stupid of me--" he paused as he sat up, and turned away from me. The pained expression on his face broke my heart.

I didn't have to doubt that I was in love with him. That was a given. What with the huge butterflies that fluttered in my stomach every time I was near him. The feeling that if I was away from him for prolonged periods of time, that it would be extremely painful.

"Please Edward, don't apologize," I grabbed for his arm, wanting to hold his hand, to feel his warmness on my skin. He pulled away almost instantly. I couldn't help the hurt expression that crossed my face. The one that stayed there. I could deal with the pain left behind from what Jacob did. I could take the pain from losing my mom. I couldn't handle the rejection from Edward. I tried to fight off the tears that started to slowly fall down my cheeks. I tried to hide the tiny sobs that came up into my throat.

"Are you crying?" his voice was soft, pain still evident in it. "I made you cry? Oh Bella, sweetheart. I'm so sorry."

He grabbed me up into his arms, and pulled me into his chest. I cried for little longer, before I hiccuped.

"Are the tears gone?" he asked, his voice was soft, and all evidence of pain was gone from his voice. He was back to the Edward I fell in love with.

"For now. I'm a girl though—I can't promise they won't come back," I joked into his chest. My chest, my heart, was still hurting from the rejection he had given me.

"I am sorry Bella. I shouldn't have kissed you. With everything you've been through. It was wrong of me," his spoke right into my ear, and it made me shiver.

"Was it that bad? That you have to use an excuse?" I was only joking—trying to hide how much I really wanted to hear that he really did enjoy the kiss. That maybe, he'd want to do it again. When I wasn't quite an emotional wreck.

"No! Of course not. It was—the best kiss ever. I know it sounds weird to say that about my best friend—it's just..."

I decided to end his pain, and cut him off. I knew he thought he was making a fool of himself.

"I'm in love with you Edward."

There straight forward and to the point. Although, the wide-eyed look he started to give me made me feel like maybe I made a mistake.

"You—what?"

I felt sorry for him. He looked dumbstruck. Like he didn't understand English.

"I'm in love with you, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen," I smiled up at him.

He hated when I used his full name. His parents knew how much he hated having two middle names. He felt like a freak in some ways.

"I love you too, Isabella Marie Swan,"

Unfortunately he knew what I hated to. Like being called Isabella.

"You do know that I'll get you back for that—right?" I smiled softly.

Whenever I was with Edward. Whenever his strong and sure arms were around me. It was like the world disappeared, and it was only me and him. When I was with him like this. It was almost like Jacob hadn't taken advantage of me. That I was undamaged, and not broken. It felt perfect, like I was were I belonged.

* * *

**Edward's POV**

I felt her soft, subtle lips moving in motion with mine. It took a minute to register that she was actually kissing me back. I thought I had imagined it. I was waiting for her to shove me. To hit me, and hate me. I almost hated myself. How could I push her like that, after what she's been through?

I wanted to moan, I wanted nothing more than to lay down with her, and kiss her lips till the end of time. Her arms wound around my neck, pulling me closer to her. It felt real, and right. Like two halves of a puzzle fitting together. Making a picture perfect. I tried to pull away a few times, but I didn't get far, before my mouth joined with hers again. Finally, getting enough control of myself I pulled way. I stared into her pool of chocolate eyes.

I saw the feelings that I felt, staring back at me through her eyes. She did want me. I could see it, by the way she was looking at me. I wanted to smile. I wanted to stand on the rooftop and scream to the world that I was in love with Isabella Swan.

"I'm sorry--"

I didn't know that two little words could hurt a person so deeply.

"No, I'm sorry Bells. I shouldn't have done that. It was stupid of me--" I stopped before I said something stupid that would cause her to walk out of my life. I turned away from her. From the desire that flowed through my blood.

I didn't have to doubt that I was utterly, and completely in love with her. I knew it to be true. I knew it was true when she first returned to Forks. My and my stupid pride. I could have had her, could have been with her. I might have been able to stop all her pain.

"Please Edward, don't apologize," her voice was soft, and not more than a whisper. Her hand grabbed for my arm. I pulled away from her touch. Afraid to be to close. Afraid that I might sub come to temptation. I peeked at her from the corner of my eyes. I saw a few tears fall from her eyes, and heard her choking on her sobs. If I wasn't horrible enough, I made her cry. I was horrible. I almost hated myself right now.

"Are you crying?" I was mentally kicking myself for being a terribly awful person. "I made you cry? Oh Bella, sweetheart. I'm so sorry."

I grabbed her up into my arms, pressing her against my chest. I felt her tears soak through my t-shirt in no time. I waited a few minutes, and heard her hiccup.

"Are the tears gone?" I asked her. Trying to regulate my voice. To try to be the Edward that deserved a girl like Bella Swan.

"For now. I'm a girl though—I can't promise that they won't come back," she tried to joke, but I could still hear the pain in her voice.

"I am sorry Bella. I shouldn't have kissed you. With everything you've been through. It was wrong of me," I whispered into her ear. I felt her shiver. I wasn't sure if she was cold, so I didn't grab a blanket.

"Was it that bad? That you have to use an excuse?" I heard her question and knew I had to get those kinds of thoughts out of her mind immediately.

"No! Of course not. It was—the best kiss ever. I know it sounds weird to say that about my best friend—it's just..."

I wasn't sure how to continue. At least how to continue without me sounding like an idiot.

"I'm in love with you Edward."

Her confession took me off guard. Had I heard her right?

"You—what?"

I tried to think to make sure I had heard her right.

"I'm in love with you, Edward Anthony Masen Cullen," She smiled up at me.

I wanted to smile. To kiss her lips. To declare my love for her, but first there was one little detail that I had to attend to. That of course, was to get her back for using my full name. She knew I hated it.

"I love you too, Isabella Marie Swan," Of course the way to get back at her, was to call her Isabella.

"You do know that I'll get you back for that—right?" she smiled softly.

I smiled back. I loved the feeling of holding her in my arms. It felt right. Like all the planets were align. Almost like they were waiting for us to be together.

* * *

**Special Shout-Out Thanks To:**

**Twilight-hood**

**Linneam**

**Ificanthavejasperilltakeseth**

**Becky1993**

**Pixiealice-xx**

**For the kind reviews**


	11. Chapter 11

**Okay, so this was totally different than what I was originally going to write, but I hope you like it nonetheless.**

* * *

Chapter Eleven

**Three Days Later**

**Bella's POV**

Three days. How much could change in three days? A lot can change in three days. While I'd like to say I wouldn't know a thing about that—I'd be lying. Three days ago I confessed my love for my best friend, and while I was scared to death that maybe—just maybe he wouldn't feel the same way. I found out that I had absolutely nothing to worry about. Edward was as much in love with me as I was for him. I know it's weird to think of best friends falling in love, but sometimes, that's the best kind of love.

While I can promise you that nothing between me and Edward has changed. I can't, however, say the same for Edward. I look at the newly black and blue right eye of his. His newly broken nose, as well as his broken right hand, and I see the changes. While I'd like to say that because of Edward the other guy looked worse—I can't. In fact, if it weren't for Edward's brother Emmett and his sister's boyfriend Jasper, Edward would have probably been injured worse.

See I have this ex-boyfriend, that doesn't get the whole—ex part. In fact, he thinks that he owns me. Like he bought me at the store or something stupid like that. To prove his point, he—marked his territory. I'm still unable to think the words, to see the image of what happened. Although through something so terrible, I had Edward. I still do. I just wish that he wouldn't act out in anger like he does. I know that Jacob is like the evilest bastard to ever live, but I knew that Edward alone couldn't take him down.

I can still see the images of that day unfold in my eyes, as I watch Edward's chest rise and fall. He's refused to leave my side since. Not that I'm complaing. I grab his unbandaged hand in mine as I let the events of that day flow through my mind one more time.

* * *

_**Beginning of Flashback**_

"_So you have Bio next right?" I asked him, as he squeezed my hand._

_I had hoped that Edward would be able to switch one of our schedules around so that either I wouldn't have any classes with Jacob, or that I'd have all my classes with Edward, Jasper, or Alice. However that wasn't an option anymore, and my next class I would spend alone with Jacob Black. I felt my inside contract at the thought. _

"_Don't worry Bells. If he gives you ANY trouble, well me and Emmett will make sure that he won't be around for away," I knew his words were meant to soothe me, but all they did was make me worry about the three of them. _

"_That's what I'm afraid of," I muttered under my breath. _

"_What?" he asked softly, as he pulled me into his side and held me closer. I felt so utterly safe in his arms that I almost didn't remember why I was worried at all. _

_That unfortunately didn't last. As we rounded the corner to stand in front of my Trig class, I meet the large mass that was Jacob Black. _

"_I'm sorry—Edmund is it? But I believe that you have your scrawny arms around MY girl. If you don't mind, you should remove said arm before I break it," his voice was deep and threatening. _

_At his words I wriggled myself out from Edward's grasp and stared wide-eyed back at Jacob. _

"_Aww, why sweet Bella. How are you feeling today?" his smile—the one that used to warm my heart, now made me want to puke on him. _

"_I hate you," I whispered at him._

"_Why I love you too darling," his grin widened. _

_Edward snarled at him, "You touch her and I swear--" _

_I didn't even have to time to scream before the first bone-crunching shot hit Edward's face. He stumbled but didn't fall down. I wished he had. I wished he would have just given in, that he would have just let Jacob win this time. He, however, regained his balance, before plowing his fist into Jacob's stomach. I have to say this now, Jacob has a very noticeable eight-pack, that is hard as a rock. Needless to say, when I heard bones crunching, I knew that it wasn't Jacob's bones. Edward nearly crumbled from the pain that shot through his hand. Jacob, being one that takes advantages of opportunities, plowed his over sized hand into Edward's face again, causing blood to pour onto the floor below them. _

_I stood there, my arms folded tightly across my chest, and all but growled at Jacob. _

"_Leave him the hell allowed. You sicken me to the point that I actually feel as if I'll throw up at the sight of you. I hate your guts so bad Jacob Black. I wish that you would just leave—or better, just go curl up in a hole somewhere and die. That is what would make me happy." _

_I spat the words in an angry hiss, that I knew everyone had heard. Especially since I heard several 'Oh Snaps' and 'Burn's'. Just as he grabbed my shoulders and shoved me—rather harshly against the locker door and suctioned his lips to my mouth in such a harsh way, I felt his fly off of me. I opened my eyes, aware that someone had come to my rescue. I saw Jasper standing front of me. He was in a half crouch, like he was ready to attack anyone who got within five feet of me. I watched, as a smile crossed my lips as Emmett pummeled the hell out of Jacob. After a few moments, I moved around Jasper, and knelt in front of Edward who was still laying on the floor. I almost cried, as I saw a small amount of blood trickle from his eye, and a massive amount pour out of his nose. His good eye was on me, and I saw the pain the seared through it. I brushed his hair back before kissing his forehead. _

_No matter who finished the job, Edward was my savior. He was my knight and shining armor, and I loved my knight with all my heart. _

_**End of Flashback**_

* * *

I snuggled down further on the bed, until my head lay on his chest. Instead of laying on his plush king size bed, at his house. We lay on my small full size bed. I listened lightly waiting for Charlie to come home. Not that he didn't allow me and Edward to be alone. He trusted us fully, and he already knew the whole story. In fact his days at work now, are full trying to get Jacob put behind bars for his hanis crime.

"Hello beautiful," he whispered in my ear. I smiled softly, loving the sound of his voice.

"Hello my handsome knight," I whispered back.

"Knight huh?" he asked.

I sighed as I sat up slightly so I could look at him.

"Even if you could take Jacob on your own, your still my knight in shining armor. If it weren't for you—I more than likely would have slumped so far into a depression that well--" I broke my sentence off. No need to speak of horrible things that would never happen now.

"You wouldn't have—would you?" he asked, a completely serious look on his face.

"I cant' say for sure. I just know that I wasn't in a good place. Not until I went to see you. Not until you held me, and I felt _safe_," I said, drawing out the word, as I snuggled into his chest.

"I will keep you safe Bella. He will not hurt you again," his spoke into my hair, before kissing the top of my head.

"I love you," I whispered softly.

"I love you too, my angel," I smiled before drifting off to a peaceful sleep.

* * *

**Special Shout-Out Thanks To:**

**Pixiealice-xx**

**Esmecullencares**

**Twilight1alice**

**Ificanthavejasperiwilltakeseth**

**brmngril**

**FRK921**

**For the kind reviews.**


	12. Chapter 12

**I know this is a bit on the short side, but I'm sure that it is filled with so much fluff that you won't care that it's so short. **

* * *

Chapter Twelve

**Edward's POV**

Yawning softly, I stretched my free arm out, feeling it pop. Sighing softly, I turned my head toward the body that was passed out beside me. A smile crossed my lips. Her head was laying contently on my chest, one arm was under her head, while the other was draped losly over my chest. I threw my free arm around her, and drew her in even closer. I felt her stir slightly, before mumbling something completely unintelligible and then she sighed happily.

"I love you Edward." I heard her say. I looked down, thinking I had woken her, but saw that she was still very much asleep. My smile grew as I realized that she was talking in her sleep. I lay completely still waiting for her next words.

"I love you so much. I don't know what I'd do without you."

I felt my eyes become wet, but quickly wiped away the tears before they fell. I knew she loved me. She had told me so quite a few times, but I never heard her say it in such a heartwarming way. In such a way that would make Emmet make puking noises if he heard us being so 'lovely dovey' as he put it.

"I love you too my angel. So very much," I whispered.

"What?" I heard her ask groggily. 'Damn, I woke her up.'

"I love you, my sweet Bella," I smiled down at her, and she blushed the most beautiful shade of red.

"I love you too Edward, so much," she smiled through the blush, reached up to kiss my lips.

This kiss was different than our usual, soft, sweet kisses. This one was full of passion and want. This was heated, and I wanted to pull away before I forced her to be uncomfortable, but every time I tried to unsuction my lips from hers, she would pull my face even closer, deepening the kiss each time. Finally, using my strength, I pulled away if only slightly.

"Bella," it was merely a whispered sigh. "It's too soon. I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I don't want you to think you have to do this--"

Her fingers ran across my lips, stopping me mid sentence.

"I want this Edward—I want you. Do me a favor?" her eyes were pleading to me, our legs were joined as one set.

"Anything," I breathed.

"Make love to me. Please," her eyes were closed, and the please was merely a breathless whisper.

Without further thought, I rejoined our lips. I promised her anything, and if this is what she really wanted. What she needed—then who was I to deny my love the one thing she desired?

* * *

**Bella's POV**

I felt a rush of feelings as I laid tangled up in Edward's arms. I wanted nothing more than for him to make love to me again. For our bodies to be joined as one, again and again. I also knew that while Edward enjoyed every part of what had just taken place, it also hurt him. Not because I had made him promise himself to me. No, because he thought that he was pushing me too far too fast. I could sense it in the fact that he hadn't utter two words since. I ran my fingers over his muscular chest, before I placed a soft kiss on his neck.

"I love you so much Edward. So much that it hurts sometimes. I don't know what I'd do without you. I don't know how I made it all this time without seeing you—without being with you. Without giving myself to you," I said, before I realized that maybe I had went too far too fast.

I felt his arms snake around me, pulling me closer. "As I love you my precious Bella. Please tell me that I haven't hurt you--."

"Nonsense Edward. You've made me happier than I thought was possible. Even with what's happened. Everything that's happened. My life feels complete now, and it's because of you," I smiled softly, as I nuzzled my face into his neck. Taking in the scent of his cologne.

"Stop, that tickles," he giggled softly.

"Really?" I asked, as I raised my head, my eyebrow raised.

"Don't even think about it!" his voice tried to be serious, but it was cut off with a round of loud laughs and giggles.

I knew my dad would be home soon, and that he would not be happy to find Edward and I in our current state—without clothes. Sighing, I sat up.

"Charlie will be home soon," he guessed.

"Yeah—we should--" I trailed off as I felt Edward set up beside me.

He kissed my shoulder blade softly, before standing up to find, and put his clothes on.

"I'd really rather your dad not kill me today. I'm too fond of living—and being with you to be shot dead by your dad," he smiled his brilliant crooked smile, and I felt the butterflies in my stomach, and my heart skip a beat. It pained me to realize that all the Hollywood 'romantics' were actually real.

"I'd rather him not kill you either. I'm rather fond of you," I smiled back at him, before following suit, and locating my clothes, and slipping them back on.

I still felt horrible looking at Edward's swollen eye, and his hand that was in a brace—from a fight that he wouldn't have had to fight—had I not come back. Although if I hadn't come back—I wouldn't be with him in the way that I was. I wouldn't' be so blissfully happy that it felt that my heart might hammer out of my chest. The saying, with all good thing come bad ones, rang in my mind, and I realized just how true that saying was. Edward was still my knight and shining armor, and he always would be. He was my knight, and I was his angel. I smiled softly, as I heard my dad's cruiser pull into the driveway. Grabbing my hand with his good one, we made our way down the stairs to greet my father.

* * *

**Special Shout-Out Thanks To:**

**PixieAlice-xx**

**Twilight Hood**

**Masen's-Girl-123**

**Becky1993**

**FRK921**


	13. Chapter 13

**Bella's POV**

I heard Edward pounding on the door. I had heard the worry in his voice with each voice mail he left on my phone. It had been nearly two weeks since we stepped up our relationship. I hadn't been to school in two days. There are two main reasons for this. One was the nausea that was so awful that it took everything in me to not throw up all over my bed. The other, was what I realized could be causing the nausea.

"Bella! Please just let me know your okay," my heart broke with his words. They were so pain filled. I was worrying him, but I just couldn't bare to tell him what I thought was wrong. I can't even bare to say the words out loud to myself.

Slowly I got up, trying not a jostle myself to much, afraid the nausea might come back. I tiptoed down the stairs, and opened the door. I didn't stop to think about how awful I looked. What with the near constant nausea, and the red puffy eyes from crying.

"Oh god. He uh—he didn't come back did he? Did he hurt you!?"

"No—it's uh—it's not anything like that—look come in," I moved out of the way, and let him slip past me.

He took the chair, so I sat in the couch just across from the chair.

"Edward—I'm late--"

"I'm not sure I understand," his face was scrunched up, and I wished I was talking to Alice. She'd understand immediately.

"My period Edward—it's late—by almost a week."

It clicked then, as he stared at him. Great, I was about to scare away the boy that I loved with all my heart.

"You think your--" he stopped mid-sentence.

I could feel the tears pouring down my face.

"What if he's the father Edward!? What if that bastard is the father?"

"Hey, you don't even know if you're pregnant okay. Look, my dad is home. Let's go, have him check you out—we'll go from there."

* * *

**Edward's POV**

Pacing back and forth, I felt Alice tug on my arm, and pull me in the chair beside her. My dad decided to take her to the hospital to have the test ran. He said it would come back faster, and that way she'd be at the hospital if it came back negative, so that he could find out what was causing her symptoms. Though I wouldn't tell her, I was almost hoping she was pregnant. At least then she wouldn't have something serious wrong with her. I'm not sure I could handle that.

"She's going to be fine, I promise."

Alice always tried her best to cheer me up when I was down. Unfortunately it was going to work this time. I was too wound up, I had to know.

"Edward, please come on back," the nurse looked slightly familiar, but I couldn't place her name.

I followed her back, and into Bella's room. My dad promised to not call Charlie, unless it wasn't a pregnancy then he would. So it was only the two of us, with the nurse promising that 'Dr. Cullen' would be in shortly.

"How are you feeling?" I asked, running my hand through my hair, as I used my free hand to hold hers.

"Not quite so sick right now—I just can't get the thought of birthing that bastard's baby--"

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it Bella. Right now, lets just make sure your not seriously ill okay?"

I kissed her hand, and gave her a weak smile. I needed her to be okay. I needed her to stay with me. Even if she was pregnant with Jacob's baby, it didn't matter. I'd be the father, I'd be there for her and the baby. I loved her too much to let something that wasn't her fault get in the way.

"Edward—Bella--the pregnancy test came back....It was positive. I have to ask this Bella—is Jacob the only one that you've--"

"No."

I answered for her, I knew that she wouldn't speak up. Maybe we could hope that the baby was mine—although I guess it did depend on when the baby was conceived.

"Who else?" my poor father looked so shocked—I knew I would be in trouble—even if not serious trouble—it would be trouble nonetheless.

"Me."

"What!?" his eyes creased, and I knew that meant he was not happy.

"I'm sorry dad—but it's just--"

"I asked him too Carlisle. It's my fault, not his."

"Of course it is. He's a person, he could have said no."

"I made him promise me. You know he won't break a promise to me."

My dad sighed. Well, once you see an OBGYN, we'll be able to tell when the baby was conceived. If it was before you and my son---then it's Jacob's. If it was after—well..."

With that he left the room. I looked over at Bella, tears were in her eyes.

"It'll be after baby, I promise."

"What if it's not? I can't make you raise a child that's not yours."

"You wouldn't have too. I love you, and anything that has to do with you. I'll love that baby like it's my own—even if it's not. It's apart of you Bells, and I love every part of you."

I sealed my promise with a kiss. I wouldn't leave her—I couldn't. It was the furthest thing from my mind.


	14. Chapter 14

_**Every long lost dream led me to where you are**_

_**Others who broke my heart they were like Northern stars**_

_**Pointing me on my way into your loving arms**_

_**This much I know is true**_

_**That God blessed the broken road**_

_**That led me straight to you**_

_**~Bless The Broken Road-Rascal Flatts~**_

* * *

**Bella's POV**

Sitting on the crinkling white paper, on the table in the only available room at the OBGYN's office, I feel as Edward grabs hold of my hand. His continuing promises that this baby would indeed be his gave my heart hope. Not a lot—but enough that if it came to not be true that it would break my heart.

"Bella, how are you feeling today?"

The woman seemed to be in her late thirties. Her hair was naturally a sandy blond color, and was starting to gray at the edges. Her blue eyes were kind, but a bit probing. I knew she probably thought wrong of me—a seventeen year old—to be pregnant. If only see knew that there were two guys that could be the possible father.

"A little nauseous."

"That's too be expected." she stopped, and looked at Edward expectantly. "Are you the father?"

Before I could say one word he spoke up. "Yes, I am."

"It's nice to see the father come in with the expecting mother."

"I wouldn't be anywhere else."

He smiled his perfect crooked smile at her, and she smiled back.

"Well Bella, if you want to lie back for me. I'll just do an ultrasound. From this we can get a general idea of how old the fetus is."

I sighed, afraid to have the answer to that question. I would rather not know, I'd rather just assume that it was Edward's. Instead, I laid back, Edward still gripping my hand, and watched the monitor.

"This is going to be a bit cold—just try and stay still."

I heard her words, but my mind was elsewhere, so when the gooey mixture hit my stomach I almost lurched off the table.

"Not exactly what I had in mind. Good thing you had a hold of her."

She quickly started to move the device, which resembled a wand, around my stomach. Almost immediately I heard the small heartbeat. I couldn't help the smile that crossed my lips. Even if it wasn't planned—even if it was that monsters baby—I couldn't stop myself from loving it all the same.

"There's that heartbeat. It's nice and strong. Hmm-mm—from the way it looks—it appears that the fetus is approximately a month old."

The words hit me so hard that tears streamed down my cheeks. What the doctor thought were happy tears, where in fact tears of a mother that had just realized that she was having her rapist's baby.

* * *

**Edward's POV**

I wanted to pull her close to me. To rock her. To promise that everything would be okay, but it was so hard. I loved her—and even knowing the baby wasn't mine, hearing it's small heartbeat, made me love it so much more. Maybe we could lie—maybe we could let everyone believe it was mine. I knew that Bella didn't want anyone else knowing what Jacob had done to her. The only people that knew, where my family—and her father. No one else knew, and that was how Bella wanted it. That was how I intended to keep it, but now it was going to be so much more difficult. Although I think telling her father might be just a smidgin more difficult. Though I loved chief Swan—he scared the hell out of me. I preferred to remain amung the living, and I knew he would have other plans once he realized that his daughter was pregnant.

The doctor had left, and Bella was staring at me—her eyes probing mine, looking for something that would tell her that I was going somewhere. That I was leaving—I wasn't.

"We'll figure it out—I promise. We can say it's mine. No one will know the difference."

"Your wrong. Carlisle will—Jacob will—he'll know something is up. What if he demands a paternity test?"

"Then we give it to him."

"Why? So he can try to take the baby from me?"

"No one—I repeat—no one would give that bastard a child. Not after what he did to you."

"I don't want anyone knowing! I don't want them looking at me differently. I already feel like a freak at school. Everyone already hates me—mostly for leaving—"

"They don't hate you—I don't think--"

"Edward—what am I going to do?"

"What are we going to do—I'm not leaving you Bella."

"But—I can't pull you into this."

"I'm already in it Bells—I'm not going anywhere. You have my heart—and I don't want it back—I want you to keep it—to have it—to love it—to care for it. Promise me that you will not push me away."

"I promise."

I could hear the truth in those two words, and knew that I could trust that she would let me in. She sat up—got dressed, and stood in front of me—tears still present in her eyes. I pulled her into my chest, my mouth inches from her ear.

"I will take care of you—and this baby. We're a family now—please remember that."

She pulled away, tears still in her eyes, as she gave me a weak smile. I felt my heart melt again, as I realized that I spoke the truth. We were a family—and I desperately wanted to make it final—I realized standing in the doctor's office that I wanted to marry Bella Swan.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen

**Bella's POV**

I could feel my stomach convulsing again. Besides a minor setback this morning, my morning sickness really hasn't been that bad. However, whatever they are serving for lunch is making my stomach churn. I grabbed a hold of Edward's arm for support. I really didn't want to throw up right in the middle of the cafeteria, but I might have no other choice.

"Bella, you okay?"

"I feel—sick," I could feel my face becoming clammy and knew I didn't have much time to make it to the bathroom. I felt his free arm waving frantically to someone. I didn't even look to see who it was, as someone ushered me from the cafeteria.

"Thought your morning sickness was over," I heard Alice hiss low in my ear.

"Me too," I spoke softly, trying to think calming thoughts. Hoping I could keep the little bit of food I'd eaten today in its place.

"Bella—people are going to start figuring it out. You can't keep it hidden forever."

"I know—I just—I don't know Alice."

There was so much more I wanted to say. Like how awful teenagers can be. How mean they are, and how fast they'll turn on each other. Like I needed or wanted to give them any ammunition like this. As soon as we were in the bathroom, I rushed into the first stall and released the contents from my stomach. After a few extra dry heaves, that left my stomach hurting, I wiped my arm across my mouth, and flushed the toilet. It wasn't until then that I could hear them. Alice must have stepped out while I threw up, and they must have come from the other entrance.

"Ten bucks says that's Bella Swan."

"I know, she looked like she was gonna vomit all over the place in the cafeteria. Ten bucks says that slut is pregnant."

"Wonder who the daddy is. That hot Indian guy that she was dating back in Phoenix or Edward Cullen."

"She probably doesn't know. She probably slept with both of them right on top of each other. Hell, maybe she didn't' them both at the same time."

I felt sick again, but for a whole other reason. I knew I wasn't going to get sick again, but I couldn't face them. I lay my head against the cool toilet seat and waited for the door to open and close. As I waited for the sound that would free me from my bathroom prison, I heard the door closer to me open.

"Bella?" Alice whispered.

I heard her audible gasp when she saw the two other girls talking about me as if I couldn't hear them. Figuring I needed to stop Alice before she got into a fist fight with both girls, I flushed the toilet again, just for good measure, and unlatched the lock, opening the door.

"Let's go Alice."

"Yeah, go protect your pregnant slut of a friend."

It took everything in me to not let go of her arm, and letting her beat their asses, but I didn't want Alice to get suspended because of me.

"Just leave them Alice."

She was locked in place, and I couldn't budge her, not even a little bit.

"Listen here. You are lucky—if my friend didn't need me right now, I'd kick both of your asses for so much as giving her a dirty look. You will, however listen to what I have to say. If I ever hear you say one more word like that too, or about Bella, then there won't be enough people in this school to protect you. I don't like to get mad, and I don't like to fight, but you've pissed me off."

"Oh—like we're scared of tiny little Alice Cullen."

I shook my head, knowing what a mistake that poor girl had just made. Yeah, Alice was tiny in size, standing at a small 5'0, and wearing only a size three. She could, however, kick any girl's ass in this place. I have seen her beat the hell out of Edward, granted we were a lot younger, and Edward hadn't grown into his potential yet, but she was still a lot strong than anyone gave her credit for, and that was a mistake.

"I'd prove you wrong, but I need to get _my friend_ home. I'll just have to kick your asses later."

With that, Alice grabbed a hold of my arm, and walked me out of the bathroom.

* * *

**Edward POV**

Fighting with Bella over going home was a battle I thought for sure I'd lose in the end. Although, a new bout of nausea helped me win. Lying beside her, on my bed was like living in heaven. We had the entire house to ourselves, and though I still wasn't allowed in Chief Swan's house, without him there to 'supervise' us, he didn't say anything about us being alone at my house.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked, her fingers tracing the muscles on my forearm.

"How great this is. Just laying here with you—and knowing that no matter what this is where you'd rather be."

"Of course it is—I love you Edward. You're my forever."

The words melted my heart, and I knew that when I finally did ask her to marry me—that she'd say yes. No one talks about forever, without marriage in mind. Then, and only then, would we truly be a family. I hugged her tighter to my body and kissed her forehead.

"You're my forever too. No one else has held my heart like you—when you moved to Phoenix, you took it with you."

She sighed softly against my chest, and then her breathing evened out. I knew she had fallen asleep, and I smiled softly. I knew that our life together would be much like this, and the thought made my heart leap. I wanted to start that life as soon as school was done with. If only this last year of high school would get over with. Closing my eyes, I whispered softly, "I love you forever Isabella Swan."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

**BELLA'S POV**

Standing by my locker in school, I could feel the eyes of every student on me. Alice had been right, I couldn't hide my pregnancy any longer. Closing my eyes, as the child growing inside me, kicks my stomach. I try to keep the smile off my lips, no need to attract attention to myself. I rub my large stomach softly, trying to soothe the kicking so that I can concentrate on the task at hand. I needed my English textbook before the bell rang. In fact I needed to retrieve that book as soon as possible. Having to waddle to my class took far too long, and I only have five minutes until the final bell rings.

"Come on, please just let me get to class on time this time."

I sighed knowing that I had to look at least halfway crazy, talking to my large stomach.

"Nice way to not bring attention to yourself."

I smiled, as Emmett Cullen leaned against the locker beside mine.

"Shove it Emmett," I tried to sound forceful with my words, but the smile on my face gave away the fact that he, as always, was entertaining to me. Even if Emmett wasn't my number one fan, since I'd become pregnant with 'his brother's child' he has become increasingly protective of me. If Edward or Jasper can't walk me to class, then he takes the job upon himself.

"You know, you say hurtful words like that, and yet—it doesn't penetrate the awesomeness that is Emmett Cullen."

I couldn't help the grin that crossed my face at Emmett's cockiness. "Oh yes, Emmett you are truly most awesome."

"Finally! The truth! Now, let's get you to English before Mr. Banner has a fit. You know how he just loves it when you interrupt his speeches of books long ago."

"Oh yes! I'm his most favorite student. At least my morning sickness is over—although the frequent, 'I'm sorry Mr. Banner I have to pee super bad,' excuses are beginning to get to him. I need a new excuse--"

"Just tell him that you're having the baby every time you have to pee—how can he not excuse you then?"

"Well, Emmett, that might work, except after about the fifth time I say I'm in labor, he'll figure something is up. Then when I really am in labor he won't let me go. So I'm gonna have to go with a no on that excuse. Got anything else in that overly intelligent head of yours?"

"Wait—your like—making fun of me—right?"

The look of utter cluelessness on his face made me crack up laughing. Emmett was one of the sweetest guys on the planet—given you have to be on his good side to see that side of him, but he is not the sharpest tool in the tool shed.

"Yes Emmett—I am making fun of you."

He glared at me for half a second, but the voice that boomed behind us made him jump into total alertness.

"So little miss slut, how do I know for sure that baby ain't mine?"

I wanted to shrink into myself and disappear, but the utter size of my stomach made that nearly impossible. Instead, I let Emmett stand in a protective crouch in front of me. I didn't want him to fight Jacob, more afraid for his safety than anything else, but I also didn't want to have to face Jacob. If anyone of the Cullen family had a chance to actually hurt Jacob, it was the beast of a man Emmett Cullen.

"Listen hear Black. You better just go on bout your damn business. I don't' wanna have to kick your scrawny ass around this damn school, but you'd better believe I will. You leave Bella, my little brother—and her baby alone! You hear me Jacob Black!"

I glanced over Emmett shoulder to make sure that Jacob hadn't shrunk, and of course he hadn't. His stature of six foot seven was still there, and in fact he looked as if he had put on even more weight. His arms were huge, and I was suddenly afraid that Emmett would lose in a fight with him.

"I'm not afraid of you Emmett, just move out of the way. I ain't gonna hurt her."

"I don't trust your stupid ass as far as I can throw you--"

"Fine, I guess this is happening the hard way."

As Jacob made a move toward Emmett and myself, I heard him let out a long hiss, and back away.

"I will find out, one way or another, if that baby is mine. You could have done this the easy way, but whatever."

Suddenly I noticed that Edward and Alice were behind me, pulling on my shoulders, trying to get me to follow them, and Jasper stood alongside Emmett in the same protective crouch.

"Lets get you to English." Alice's voice was a hushed whisper, as she toted me alongside her, trying to hide me from the on lookers.

* * *

**EDWARDS POV**

"He cant' do that—can he!?" I could hear my own voice booming in my ears. I was pissed off, that Jacob Black—the guy that had raped my girlfriend, had the gull to stand there and talk about the baby—our baby!

"Edward, if it's his child—he can do whatever he wants. He has rights too."

"Like hell I'm gonna let that bastard near this baby! That bastard raped you. He's a vile man, and if I could, I'd rip his damn head off for what he did to you."

I watched her shudder, and knew she was thinking about what Jacob had done to her. I wanted to kill the bastard for what he had put her through, but I knew that ending up in jail for murder would not help Bella at all, so instead, I wrapped my arms around her as well as I could and kissed her cheek.

"I know that he is awful Edward. I hate him as much as you do, but if he is this baby's father—he'll still have rights to it--"

"Maybe not—I mean what he did to you was criminal Bella. I have the rape kits to prove it, and though your dad decided to just 'threaten' Jacob, if that kit comes out and proves that he raped you. He could lose all rights to that child--"

"I don't—know--I just—"

"Bella, you don't want him raising this baby right?"

"No—but Edward—it was hard enough to tell you and Carlisle about it. I don't know that I can tell a room full of strangers—or my dad what happened. I just--"

Her body started to shake as tears fell down her cheeks. I wanted to promise her that everything would be okay, but the last time I did that it went straight to hell. How could I promise her that this—shitty situation would be okay. How could I promise her that she wouldn't' have to testify—that she wouldn't' have to relive what that monster had done to her?

"I promise you Bella, no matter what happens, I will be right here."

That was the only promise that I could make and keep at the moment, so I figured that was better than not saying anything at all. I wasn't lying, no matter what happened, I wouldn't leave her—I would never leave her.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen

Sitting in the judges chambers, I hear Edward's words of confidence running through my mind. What an idiot I was to believe him. My dress clung to my large pregnant belly, my eyes were red-rimmed from all the crying. My worst nightmare come true. Having to relive what Jacob did to me all over again. In front of the whole damn town. I shudder as I realize that my dad is in attendance. He hadn't heard the whole story—just that Jacob was a little rough with me. He probably thinks I'm a huge slut, that just does it with whatever guy will have me.

"Miss Swan, we're ready for you."

I try to offer the young bailiff a smile, but it's barely even half a smile. Clutching my stomach in a protective way, I try and shove my huge body up off the chair.

"I'm sorry. Let me help you."

I give him a more genuine smile this time. His hand grabs, gently, behind my arm, lifting me up from the chair.

"Thank you. I'm like a giant walking balloon."

He smiled thoughtfully at me, as he walked beside me to the door.

"I can tell your scared. Don't be. No one can hurt you out there. That's what I'm for."

Like that helped me at all. Not that I didn't trust the overly nice bailiff, it was that I knew that Jacob could take him so easily that it would almost be painful to even think about. I would have felt better if Emmett was in charge of keeping me safe. Taking a deep breath, I offered the young man one last smile before waddling out of the chambers and up to the witness stand. After I was sworn in, I sat as gingerly as my bulkiness would allow. I leaned forward as well as I could, and felt completely worn out from all the movement.

"Now, Miss Swan. Can you please, for the jury, explain to us what happen between you and Mr. Black."

"Well. Back in Phoenix, we were sort of dating. After my mom died, and I decided to move back here to be with my father, I broke up with him. Jacob followed me to Forks, and started to harass me and my friends. At first it was just threats, but late one evening. I was walking home, and he jumped me from behind."

I stopped to take a breath, I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

"He dragged me into an alley, and shoved me against the wall of the building behind us. He put his hand over my mouth and said that he was going to mark his Territory. He pulled his hand away from my mouth to help him---undress me."

I closed my eyes and took another breath. I wasn't sure what was wrong, but something was definitely not right. I lay a hand gingerly over my stomach. I could feel the haziness coming over me, and I knew that I was losing consciousness.

* * *

Watching her facial expression from the front row I saw when her expression changed from terrified to absolutely shocked and fearful. I knew something was wrong, and I didn't know what to do. I leaned over to my dad. He had to help her.

"Dad, somethings wrong with her."

He looked up, and more carefully, just as she shut her eyes and grabbed for her stomach. He shook his head knowingly. He stood up swiftly.

"Excuse me, Judge Johnson. Something is medically wrong with this young woman."

As my dad talked to the Judge I saw her start to sway. I would not let her fall to the floor. I jumped up from my chair, and leaped over the barrier, and slid up the stairs to the witness stand just in time to catch Bella in my arms. She was definitely unconscious, and what was the sticky stuff running down her leg? I looked, and thought I might be sick. Blood was running down her leg. Not profusely, but enough to be worry-some.

"Dad! She's bleeding!"

In an instant he took control of the situation, and I had never been happier to have such a competent doctor as my father.

"I need an ambulance, now! Edward, lay her down, I need to examine her."

He leaned over her. Checking this and that, as I paced back and forth. I felt a hand on my shoulder, and saw that at some point Alice had come to stand beside me. I felt like I wanted to cry. I might not be a doctor myself, I knew that a pregnant woman bleeding wasn't a good thing.

"Edward."

My father's voice brought me back to the here and now. I knelt down beside him. His hand was on my shoulder.

"It's not looking good. I can't be sure until I get her in the hospital, but it appears that her placenta has torn. The baby is in distress. I may only be able to save one of them."

"You don't have to ask. Do whatever you have to, but you save her. I can't lose her dad. Not again."

"Like hell! That is MY baby. You will save my child."

Jacob's husky voice boomed through the courtroom. The judge banged his gavel loudly, and Jacob shut his mouth.

"Excuse me Mr. Black. I can't technically decide in this case because it's a jury trial, and Miss Swan hasn't finished with her statement, but it seemed very well that you raped her. I'm sorry, but as a human, I can't let you, let this young lady die. Besides, since she is a minor, her father will be in charge of paperwork. I assure you Mr. Black, he will do everything to save his daughter."

I wanted to jump up and give the judge a great big hug, but I controlled myself. I stayed right beside Bella, and held her hand. I wanted her to know I was right there. I wanted her to know I hadn't broken my promise to her. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Emmett stalking along behind Jacob, ready to jump him if he tried anything funny. The paramedics had arrived, and they were dragging the gurney behind them. My dad meet with them, they shook their heads at whatever he was saying. Quicker than I would have thought possible they were loading her up on the gurney, and rushing her out of the courtroom. I was left on my knees, tears streaming down my face.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

"Edward, please sit down."

Alice's begging, dragging, fearful voice brought me back down to earth. Bella was rushed into an emergency C-section. The doctor thought that he might be able to save them both if he got to work immediately. While I'd love to have Bella and the baby to make it. It would finally be our dream come true. Our family. I tried to fight the smile at the thought of me and Bella finally having our family. Finally starting our family. Right now, I had to be strong for Bella. I had to be okay with the possibility of losing the baby.

"Edward, she's in good hands. Dad even scrubbed in on the surgery. He will make sure that Bella makes it through this."

"I know--I just," I hadn't realized that tears had been sliding down my face. The utter desperation that thumped in my chest made me feel like my heart might pound it's way out of my chest. I felt Alice's tiny hand close around mine. She might be scary to some, yes my small sister scared some, but Alice is the best sister anyone could ask for.

"Don't worry. She's tough as I don't know what. She'll make it."

Emmett put a giant hand on my shoulder. I felt a little better to be surrounded by family. To be in the presence of people who also cared about Bella. People who would also be upset if she didn't make it.

"Edward. Can I have a moment?"

I looked up, and meet Charlie Swan's eyes. His wise eyes were red-rimmed and I knew that he too was afraid he might lose his daughter. I just shook my head, afraid my voice might break if I tried to talk. Alice hugged me tightly and gave Charlie her stern 'you hurt him, I hurt you' look. Then Emmett patted my shoulder and just nodded his head at Charlie. I had to admit I was a little frightened. This was a man that did not trust me and Bella to be alone in his house. This was the chief of police, if he really wanted to he could probably find some reason to toss my ass in jail. This was a man that I respected with every ounce of my being.

"Edward. I know I've been tough on you. I guess you could even say I've been borderline cruel to you. You have to realize that I worry about Bella. I mean, you see what she was dating back in Phoenix, but I know better. You're a good guy Edward. Your becoming quite a fine young man. I know that you'll take care of my little girl. I just want you to know that you have my blessing to date my daughter. I can tell that she means a lot to you. I can tell that you cherish her in a way that she deserves. I mean, hell you were willing to raise a child that wasn't even yours."

"Don't talk like that."

My voice startled me. It was dark and almost mencing. This was a voice that I had heard Emmett and Jasper use. This was a voice that I'm certain Jacob Black has used. This was not a voice that I've used, it's one that I hoped I never used again.

"Excuse me."

His voice kind of quivered, almost like he too was afraid of how my voice sounded.

"They're both still alive. There is still a chance. Don't talk like that baby is dead. I mean if it comes down to bella or the baby, then of course, Bella is the obvious of choice. Until then though, they can both be saved. Now if you don't mind. I'm gonna go to the chapel to pray for them."

With that I stood up and walked away. I almost felt proud of myself. Standing up for Bella and her baby. That monster might be the father, but that baby is part of Bella too. She loves that baby even if her father doesn't. Anything that Bella loves, I love too.

* * *

"Edward. Wake up."

The ringing voice woke me from my almost sleepless slumber. I stretched out my tense legs before standing up. I looked at Alice. A worried expression crossed my face. Had something happened? Had I lost them both?

"Is she---"

"Bella made it. She's stable, but she's still critical. Long story short--she can't have children anymore. It was the only way to get the bleeding to stop. When they tried to get the baby out, her placenta tore completely. I'm not a doctor, but apparently that set in motion a whole lot of problems, which included Bella losing a lot of blood. They gave her a transfusion, removed her ovaries, among other things. Now she can't have children."

"What about the baby? Did the baby make it?"

"They thought it might, but it's not looking good. He can't breathe on his own. He's so tiny Edward."

I couldn't help the tears that fell from my eyes. Bella was in critical condition, and her, our baby boy might die. My life went from being near perfect, to being a pile of shit in no time. I just wanted to be alone. I didn't want anyone to see me like this. To see my so helpless, so hopeless.

"Can I see her?"

"Not yet. Dad said he'd come get you when she can have visitors. You can go see the baby though."

I nodded at her, though I wasn't really listening.

"Look, I just--I need to be alone for a bit. Tell dad to call me when I can see Bella."

Without waiting for an answer, I started off in the opposite direction. I shoved my fists in my pockets, as tears rolled down my cheeks. I found the room I was seeking and walked right in. I walked right past the front pew of the chapel, and sunk to my knees. Tears blurred my sight, and shoved my palms into my eyes, trying to make the tears stop. I had to be strong for Bella. For the baby fighting for it's life, and all I could do was cry.

"God. Please, just let them both make it. Please don't take them away from me. They're my life. I can't function without them. Please god."

I let my head fall into my hands, as my body shook with sobs. My sobs were so loud that I didn't hear the door open, or the footsteps behind me. I didn't notice when someone knelt down beside me. I only realized I was no longer alone when I felt arms wrap around my shoulders, pulling me against their shoulder. It was my mom. She was always so good at calming me down, this time though, I think I was even past that.

"I might lose both of them mom. What am I going to do?"

"You talk to god, son. You pray that they'll make it through this. You be there, for both of them. Be strong Edward. That's what Bella and the baby need. They need someone strong, right there beside them. They need to know that they have someone waiting for them. Needing them to pull through this. They need you, just as badly as you need them. Give them what they need Edward."

I sighed softly, as I raised my head from her shoulder. Her shirt was stained with my tears. I offered her a small sad smile, as I removed a small black box from my inside jacket pocket.

"I'm going to ask Bella to marry me."

I was waiting for her to become upset with me. To tell me how we're too young. How our relationship won't last. Instead, she did the opposite.

"Good. If your relationship can last through all of this, then I do believe marriage is the right path for the two of you. I'm happy for you Edward, and I do believe that you'll get the chance to ask her."

She smiled softly, even though her smile had a sad look to it, it made me feel just a bit better.

"Thanks mom."

"For what?"

"Being there for me."

"That's what moms are for Edward, honey."

She hugged me softly, before leaving me alone with my thoughts. I was going to take her words into action. I was going to go see the baby, our baby. Then hopefully, I'd be able to go see my future wife.


	19. Chapter 19

**Firstly, I want to apologize for nearly abandoning this story. I didn't really give up on it. I just kinda hit a brick wall with it. Then I lost my desktop, followed shortly by my laptop. Luckily I got my desktop working (worlds easiest problem and it took my like four months to figure out.) Decided to do some updating, and really kinda ran with this one. **

**Second of all, this is the second to the last chapter. The next one will be a epilogue, and then that's it. This has been a fun journey, and I hope you've enjoyed reading it!**

* * *

Chapter Nineteen

The crying infants echoed through my head. My sight was blurry from tears. He was so small. He was Bella in tiny baby boy form, and looking at him made the tears come faster, harder. Before I knew it, I was sobbing, almost uncontrollably. It almost scared me how much I loved this tiny little boy that I didn't even know. I wanted nothing more than for him to live, to get bigger, stronger. To be a part of our family.

"Can I hold him?"

I looked up at the petite blond nurse. Her smile was friendly, and I had hope that she couldn't, or wouldn't turn down a father who could lose both his girl and his baby.

"I'm so sorry sir. He has to stay in the incubator. You can put your hand in that hole though, and you can talk to him."

"Thank you."

I tried my best to smile at her. It was difficult, and I'm sure it wasn't very close to a smile, but at least I gave it an effort. As she walked past, she placed a hand on my shoulder.

"I've seen tinier guys than this pull through. You just have to keep a strong hold on your faith. Don't give up on him. Let him know how much you love him, how much you want him to come home. Trust me, nothing is more powerful than the love of a parent."

"Thank you so much—"

"You can call me Denise."

She smiled once more, before disappearing from the small room off of the nursery.

"Come on little man. You gotta get bigger so you can come home. Your mommy and I am so worried about you."

I knew if Bella was conscious, that if she knew that his life hung in the balance just as much as hers did, that she too would be worried. I knew that should would be right here with me, talking to him, trying to get him to get stronger.

Yawning I turned around and spotted a rocking chair in the corner. I knew that I wasn't going to leave his side until I could see Bella. I walked over, grabbed a hold of it and carried back over to his incubator. I would sit right here, holding his hand until Alice calls. Sitting down the chair is more comfortable than I would have dreamed. In that instant I realize that I've more or less been awake for almost 24 straight hours. Except for the two hour nap I stole just a half hour earlier. Laying my head back, I closed my eyes. Let myself drift off to a world where Bella was completely fine. Where our baby was fine. Where the baby was mine, and we were happy. A place where we didn't know of the trouble of this world.

* * *

The steading beeping was a noise that I should be used to, a noise that came with being mortally clumsy. The beeping was that of a heart rate machine. The tube that was lodged down my throat was new. Fumbling in the dark room, I found the control pad, and pressed the help button.

For reasons I was unsure of, I was in a hospital bed, obviously in a hospital room. I couldn't remember why, or how I got here. What injury I had sustained to be in the hospital. I just hoped that whatever happened, my baby was okay. My fingers skimming down toward my protruding belly, I found that the movement caused me pain. With an almost flash of light I remembered everything. The sob caught in my throat and I thought I might choke from the breathing tube.

"Stay calm ma'am, please."

The young male nurse that came in looked like he was in over his head. His eyes were round like saucers, and his breathing was labored. He was having a panic attack, when it should be me. I was the one that didn't know if her baby was alive, or if I had lost him.

"Bella. Sweetheart calm down. We have to keep your heart rate down. I will explain everything once I get the breathing tube out."

Carlisle's familiar blond hair, and kind eyes helped my heart rate slow down, if only a little bit. His eyes, usually so happy, looked drawn. Red and puffy, it appeared that Carlisle had been crying. This fact scared me more than I had thought. Was my baby boy dead? Had I not been taking care of myself good enough. What had I done to hurt my poor baby.

"Bella, cough for me, so I can remove the breathing tube."

Choking back the sob that wanted to come out, I coughed as well as I could without bursting out in tears. With one swift pull the tube was out of my throat, and then I was coughing without trying.

"Here, drink some of this. It'll soothe your throat."

I took a few small sips of the cold water, grimacing as it burned all the way down my tender throat.

"Baby."

My voice was hoarce and hard to hear, but I knew Carlisle could hear me.

"Your baby is alive Bella. He is currently in an incubator. He's very premature. He has a hard time ahead of him. He's got a lot of weight to gain before he can be taken home. We will learn a lot tonight. If he makes it through the night, then it looks good for him."

"What happened to me, and please Carlisle, keep it in simple man terms."

"Basically, your placenta torn. We had to do an emergency Cesarean if we wanted any chance to save both you and the baby. When we got inside, the bleeding was worse than we thought, and we were having hard time stopping it."

"Carlisle. Just be straight with me."

"You can't have any more children. I'm so sorry Bella."

I bit my lip to keep myself from crying, as I looked up at Carlisle's sad eyes. It was like he blamed himself for what happened.

"It's not your fault. Where is Edward?"

"I'll get him."

Without one more word, and with his shoulders hunched, he left me alone in the darkened hospital room. At least I was alive, and so was my baby. I had to believe that he would make it.

* * *

Sighing, I stood outside of Bella's room. I had to be strong. I had to not cry for her. She needed me to be strong so that she could cry. I opened the door, and felt the tears slide down my cheeks. So much for being strong.

"I was so worried."

It was all I could get out, without letting on that I was crying.

"I'm sorry."

She held out her hand, and I took the few extra steps to her bed, grabbed a hold of her hand. I couldn't stop the tears, even though I wanted to. I didn't want her to see me like this. So weak.

"Edward, please don't cry."

"I can't help it. I thought I was going to lose you. You were bleeding so much, and you were so white."

I lifted her hand and kissed it gently.

"I can't live without you Bella. Not again."

"I'm not going anywhere."

She offered me a small sad smile, and squeezed my hand. I tried to force a smile back at her.

"Have you seen him?"

"Yes. That's where I came from. I've been there for a few hours. I fell asleep."

I couldn't help the sheepish grin that crossed my face. Falling asleep hold my baby's hand was an image I'm sure Bella would have loved to see.

"How long had you been awake?"

"Almost twenty-four hours. Except for a two hour nap I took while you were in surgery."

"You fell asleep while I was in surgery?"

"I didn't mean to, I just could not stay awake."

"I understand. I was teasing."

"I love you my sweet Bella."

"I love you too Edward."

Without another thought I pulled the small velvet box from my pocket and held it out to her.

"Then marry me. Please, make me the happiest man in the world. Be my wife."

"Without a doubt."

I pulled the ring from the box, and placed it on her finger. Even with every bad thing that had happened to us, I knew in that instant that everything would be okay. That we would be a family, and that we would be happy. No matter what anyone might say, having Bella as my wife, and hoping that our boy would get strong enough to go home soon, is all I need to make my life full and worthwhile.


End file.
